Pick up lines - these can't be real..

[Capt_Oblivious]

Worst Dating Pick-up Lines

A British dating site asked its female members to tell them the worst pick-up lines they've ever heard. Here are the top 30. Hard to believe there are guys out there who would try such lines, but a reporter from the Sun tabloid went up to good-looking women on the street and tried them, getting reactions ranging from "Aw, that's so sweet and very cute." to "F--k off!" (Guys don't really introduce themselves as "Bond -- James Bond" and expect the same reaction the fictional character gets in the movies, do they?!)

1. I'm here. What were your other two wishes?
2. Do you believe in love at first sight -– or should I walk by again?
3. Nice dress. Can I talk you out of it?
4. That dress would look great –- on my bedroom floor.
5. I may not be Fred Flintstone but I could make your Bedrock
6. I seem to have lost my telephone number, may I borrow yours?
7. Get your coat, you've pulled.
8. Here's 20 [cents]. Call your mum and tell her you won't be home tonight.
9. If you think you'll regret it in the morning, we could sleep until afternoon.
10. Is it hot in here or is it you?
11. Does God know you've escaped from heaven?
12. I think I've seen you on the cover of Playboy.
13. I'm new around here. Could you direct me to your flat?
14. If I could arrange the alphabet I would put U and I together.
15. There's something wrong with my eyes –- I can't taken them off you.
16. I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.
17. I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day.
18. Do you sleep on your stomach or can I?
19. You must be tired. You've been running through my mind all evening.
20. What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this.
21. You look like someone I know.
22. Do you come here often?
23. Drink up -– you've pulled.
24. How do you like your eggs in the morning? [To this one, the Sun reporter added, "fertilised or unfertilised?"]
25. I feel like Richard Gere because I'm standing next to the Pretty Woman.
26. You're great at fishing because you've caught me -– hook, line and sinker.
27. Bond. James Bond.
28. You look so good I could drink your bath water.
29. Are you free tonight, or will it cost me?
30. If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?

[fridge]

You've got hungry eyes, and I'm the buffet.

Can I get a picture of you? I want Santa to know exactly what I want for Christmas.

These lines work all the time for me. And by all the time, I mean never.

[seldon]

Are you from Tennessee? Cause you're the only ten I see.

Your father must be a crook, cause he stole all the stars out of the sky and put them in your eyes.

I have a watch that can tell if you're wearing panties or not. Lemme check, you're not.

Reply: Yes I am!

Oh, it must be an hour fast.

[CantDog]

This one is fun:

I've always wanted to fuck a fat chick.


Then there are the old college standbys(at least for the past 3 years)

So, whats your major?

[Mrs Roo]

Originally posted by Capt_Oblivious
Worst Dating Pick-up Lines

7. Get your coat, you've pulled.
20. What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this.
21. You look like someone I know.
22. Do you come here often?
30. If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?

I've had these....

Your father must be a theif, cause he stole all the stars out of the sky and put them in your eyes.

..and this tried on me in the past (none of them by Roo I hasten to add).

I think it's a sad testimony to the state of British seduction that these horrors are still being used!

BTW Roo just blushed and looked coy. Worked for me!!!

[Rascal King]

I like this one

Here's 20 [cents]. Call your mum and tell her you won't be home tonight

I bet that would actually work.

[iceman]

Originally posted by Rascal King
I like this one

Here's 20 [cents]. Call your mum and tell her you won't be home tonight

I bet that would actually work.

In smoke-some-dope, Alberta, you may be right.

Elsewhere, no.

[Rascal King]

Then that is all that matters.

[Platinum Pete]

The truly fucked up thing about that list is that any of those lines paired, when with a real British accent, would score better than 60% in most US bars.

[seldon]

If I had a dime for every woman I've seen as fine as you, I'd have 10 cents.

[Rascal King]

I like chicken, wanna fuk?

[seldon]

My best, directed towards altachic after she recounted her tale of some guy coming up to her and saying "nice pigtails, wanna fuk?":

"hey altachic, nice avatar, wanna fuk?"

http://tetongravity.com/forums/showt...a&pagenumber=2

[random]

if I saw a girl like you everyday I got out of jail, I’d want to go to jail a whole lot more often

from a sketchy unshaven, dirty clothes, missing teeth homeless dude when I was standing at a crosswalk downtown when I was 16.

edit: ....from an e-mail I got today


(Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get you out of these wet clothes.
Nice legs...what time do they open?
Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?
Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?
I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to
you.
I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?
I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.
Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.
I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Walmart, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter.
Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.
You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.
You can feel the magic between us ... No lower!
I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.
Girl, if you were a porch I'd take out all the nails and screw ya.
If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
(Look down at the crotch) It's not just going to suck itself.
You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
F*@# me if I'm wrong but is your name Helga?
Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.
Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?
Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to.
If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.
I may not be Dairy Queen but I'll treat you right.
Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go home without me.
Do you sleep on your stomach at night? Can I???
Do you wash your pants in Windex because I can see myself in them.
I lost my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap
motel room.

[Endlessseason]

if I saw a girl like you everyday I got out of jail, I’d want to go to jail a whole lot more often

Originally posted by random
from a sketchy unshaven, dirty clothes, missing teeth homeless dude when I was standing at a crosswalk downtown when I was 16.

http://endlessseason.com/smilies/rotflmao3.gif

[The AD]

Originally posted by Capt_Oblivious
Worst Dating Pick-up Lines
7. Get your coat, you've pulled.

Is there anyone who can translate this from English to American for me?

[Dr. Crash]

Work a bit for it and read this article.

drC

[13]

"Hi" seems to work for me.

Followed by a firm pat on the butt.

[ak_powder_monkey]

Originally posted by Mrs Roo

BTW Roo just blushed and looked coy. Worked for me!!!

I'm really good at that, excelent

[BakerBoy]

Originally posted by 13
"Hi" seems to work for me.

Followed by a firm pat on the butt.

...you don't have to lie to kick it, porch monkey....

[MacDaddy]

nice work fellas do you know how DIZZY gots reading that

[MacDaddy]

Originally posted by MacDaddy
nice work fellas do you know how DIZZY gots reading that

LPOAT!!!!!

[The AD]

Originally posted by Dr. Crash
Work a bit for it and read this article.

drC

The funny thing is they claim "on the pull" is a US term, but I've never heard of it.

[Dr. Crash]

I think you're mistaken. I think the mention of "US: blah blah" is for you US guys (and me actually) to understand the term by giving other (US) terms that we can understand. But I may be wrong; it wouldn't be the first time.

drC

[13]

Originally posted by BakerBoy
...you don't have to lie to kick it, porch monkey....

Shhhh.

[G]

"nice goggle tan, wanna fuk?"

"Okay, so what's your rate for just a half-hour? "