Hypothetical Situation

[girlski0912]

I would take the run, enjoy the high, and burn it in my memory for when I am rehabilitating...as long as it was only an injury that didn't keep me from skiing. Death, at my age, would be better than paralysis but to die at 24 without having lived my life to it's fullest would not be the happiest way to go. I am with Snowsprite, I hope I die doing what I love but I also hope I don't do it tomorrow!
Life is to be lived, and to live is to learn. I have learned alot from injuries that have kept me off of the hill even if it was purely a fluke accident that caused my injury to begin with. Everything happens for a reason, and you don't realize it at the time...As long as you can learn from it, I say all systems go.

[seldon]

I've followed this thread for a while without posting, and although my first reaction was, hell, I'd do it, I've thought more about it. I'm 15, and I plan to have at least 50 more years of hard charging skiing and then another 10-15 of mellower stuff. After thinking about it, I realized I wouldn't do it tomorrow.

Couple of years ago staring at the stars on a river bank I was thinking about how I want to die. And I realized that when I know I'm making my last turns of my life, I want to climb the biggest mountain I can find with the most beautiful snow ever. I figure if I know this is it for me, the way I want to go is at some point on the best run of my life.

So, in a final answer to your question gin, I'll take that run. I just want to delay it 75 years so I can have the experiences of all those imperfect runs, those beautifully flawed picture postcards that are burned into my retina, those memories that float just behind my eyes as I fall asleep in classes. I'll take that run and look forward to the unstompable cliff at the bottom. But I'll only take it with those memories. As I float through the air just seconds before that iminent impact, I'll relive all the beautiful days of my life, my loves, my turns, my successes, my failure, my family, my life. And if by the time I hit the ground I hope I'll be happy to have done what I did, made the choices I made, chosen all those imperfect memories. And I'll know the instant I hit the ground that I made the right choice, a lift time of skiing, a lift time of improving, capped by a run that cannot be surpassed, a run that is truely, completely epic.

[fiddler]

Originally posted by gincognito
The question isn't so much about risk and fear as it is about short term euphoria versus long term suffering.
What price do you put on your pain?
d.

I'm all in favor of short term euphoria without the long term suffering. I know too much about long term suffering. My wife is in pain 24 hrs a day every day.(for the last ten years) Nothing fatal but nothing curable either. A little euphoria is not worth it, period. Being in pain all the time so that you can barely function and can't do all the things you love makes you not really want to live. The stress and emotional pain caused by this is hard to describe. Skiing and music are the two things I use the most to relieve them. So it's fine to philosophize but when it comes down to the reality of living with daily pain and how it affects you, your loved ones and friends it's a whole different story. Sorry to get so heavy but it's been a very bad couple of months because of this. I ski as much as possible, about 40 days so far this year, but I also know I can't afford to get hurt and miss work for rehab. I have to keep the money and the insurance coming in to cover the incredible cost of chronic pain. Believe me when I say you don't want to go there for the sake of that so-called perfect run.
I don't usually get so personal on the board but this topic got me into spewage mode.

[noodles]

"Dying doing something you love" is the stupidest shit I've ever heard, and I hear it a whole lot. Some ignorant fool will spew it in ever RIP thread, of course those are not the place for this rant. When you are doing something you love - that's when you want to live the most. It's much better to die doing something you hate, then it's a relief.

[snowsprite]

Noodles, I have to disagree. I definitely want to die while I am in happy mode. For instance, if I were die here in this shitty grey cubicle I WILL bitch-slap God with all my might. That is a given.
Sprite

[gincognito]

If you're Buddhist, you place great importance on your state of mind at the time of your death. The more calm, peaceful and content you are at the end of this life, the closer you will move towards spiritual enlightenment in the next.

Or something like that.

I like seldon's answer. I suppose timing has a lot to do with it (as snowsprite pointed out). Fiddler: I'm sorry to hear of your troubles. Also sorry if I in any way touched a nerve.

I guess I was just playing with the idea of getting into bad situations because they feel so good at first. The movie I referred to (Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind) deals with this to some extent and got me thinking on other tangents. How we are perhaps able to delude ourselves that "this time it will be different" just so we can have one more taste of the fruit. Heart versus mind. Emotion versus reason. I tried to bring it to skiing, but it may have been a bit clunky.

If I knew I was going to ski the perfect run in the perfect way, if I'd somehow got a glimpse of that and knew it for certain, if I felt the anticipation and the excitement of pure nirvana...I think it would be hard not to delude myself into feeling that I could escape the inevitable ending.

Perhaps this time it would be different.

Sick and ashamed and happy (and, sorry for the confusion: I am not injured - the acl tear I spoke of happened years ago and I was simply using it as an example),
d.

[Endlessseason]

Originally posted by fiddler
Skiing and music are the two things I use the most to relieve them. So it's fine to philosophize but when it comes down to the reality of living with daily pain and how it affects you, your loved ones and friends it's a whole different story.

Fidds--The way your family has dealt with it for all of these years is an inspiration.

[Endlessseason]

Fiddler on one of those good days:
http://skistreak.com/2002/pics/labor_wknd/fiddler2.jpg

[fiddler]

gin, you don't have to worry about touching a nerve, I just have to let it out once in a while.
Endless, thanks for the kind words and the somewhat embarrasing picture!
Look at that big air I got!