I need to sift my shit

[KoKopeLLi]

If your teeth are yellow I wouldn't suggest eating any corn

[Lone Star]

[ANON-505]

bump.

Today I swallowed a cap that basically makes up half of my front tooth. $950 to have a new one, or $70 to put the old crown back on. The obvious thought is that I'm going to have to sift my shit to get it back and save myself $900. On my way home, I started to think of the actual logistics on how to sift my own shit, and I realized that it sounds pretty challenging and also quite unplesasant..so I thought to myself that I'd post a thread on TGR asking if anyone has any shit sifting advice.

Before posting though, in fear of getting JONGed I searched "sift shit".

fucking amazing. already a two page thread on the subject.

I was thinking maybe crapping into a sturdy zip-loc and then go for it that way. Then dispose of the zip loc. in your neighbors trash.

My brother has already started with the jokes. "wow your breath smells like shit". "oh, bro, you have a little shit on your lip"

[KungFu Eddie]

Just hang out with the girls from, two girls one cup, they will sift it for you in the most horrible way imaginable.

If you don't know what this is, don't look it up. It's terrible and not suitable for anybody.

[skibuminwyo]

I just looked it up. Now I need to vomit. I made it about twenty seconds in, and my stomach turned and bile rose in the throat.

[KungFu Eddie]

I just looked it up. Now I need to vomit. I made it about twenty seconds in, and my stomach turned and bile rose in the throat.

Don't say you were'nt warned. There are some great vids on youtube of peoples recations while watching it.

[FreakofSnow]

bump.

Today I swallowed a cap that basically makes up half of my front tooth. $950 to have a new one, or $70 to put the old crown back on. The obvious thought is that I'm going to have to sift my shit to get it back and save myself $900. On my way home, I started to think of the actual logistics on how to sift my own shit, and I realized that it sounds pretty challenging and also quite unplesasant..so I thought to myself that I'd post a thread on TGR asking if anyone has any shit sifting advice.

Before posting though, in fear of getting JONGed I searched "sift shit".

fucking amazing. already a two page thread on the subject.

I was thinking maybe crapping into a sturdy zip-loc and then go for it that way. Then dispose of the zip loc. in your neighbors trash.

My brother has already started with the jokes. "wow your breath smells like shit". "oh, bro, you have a little shit on your lip"

This thread is the SHIT! 2 drops. Most excellent. Please keep us apprised of your shit sifting expedition. No pics please.

[Hugh Conway]

a turd burglar could make a mint here.

[sftc]

This thread is the SHIT... No pics please.

So wrong to want to see them, but yet pics would be so right if this rescue mission is a success. I want to see the tooth in the poo and the tooth in the mouth. It would be a notable and record breaking TR for this place.

[counterfeitfake]

Fuck me! I never thought my shit stunk.

This cannot be overstated- unless for some reason you've become intimately familiar with your own shit lately, the smell is FAR WORSE than you're imagining. In the last couple of years, I've had many more exposed bowel movements- into plastic bags, rocky ledges, and the like- then I had ever previously hoped to have. There's a good reason normal people dump into bowls full of water.

If you're thinking about sifting through your own shit, the awful smell is something that bears thinking about, and planning contingencies around.

[Woodsy]

ANON gets maggot of the month for searching for his subject before starting a new thread & in the process resurecting this gem I somehow missed the first time.....
my advice when found is bleach.

[snowsprite]

I don't know who you are...but I can safely say that after reading this I won't be eating spaghetti or salad at any maggot's house. Ever!

Sprite

[yooper]

I'd recommend retiring your wooden spoon after you find your veneer.....

[Viva]

After crapping in the straining device, why not carry the load outside (preferably somewhere in the garden in need of fertilizer) and blast it with a hose from a safe distance?

[cptpowder]

bump.

Today I swallowed a cap that basically makes up half of my front tooth. $950 to have a new one, or $70 to put the old crown back on. The obvious thought is that I'm going to have to sift my shit to get it back and save myself $900. On my way home, I started to think of the actual logistics on how to sift my own shit, and I realized that it sounds pretty challenging and also quite unplesasant..so I thought to myself that I'd post a thread on TGR asking if anyone has any shit sifting advice.

Before posting though, in fear of getting JONGed I searched "sift shit".

fucking amazing. already a two page thread on the subject.

I was thinking maybe crapping into a sturdy zip-loc and then go for it that way. Then dispose of the zip loc. in your neighbors trash.

My brother has already started with the jokes. "wow your breath smells like shit". "oh, bro, you have a little shit on your lip"

Hey Anon, wipe that shit eating grin off your face!!
And the jokes will never stop. Unless you start crying . Then Ill do it again.

[cptpowder]

Seriously though. In discussion with my partners here at the FD. Because its already public knowledge.
The question is, Is the Mrs. ok with you digging your tooth out of your shit? Is she gonna think about it every time she kissses you? A new tooth might be cheaper than counsleing. Just saying.
Me personally I dig the thing out my own shit and put back in my mouth. But Im a cheap bastard with no gf. Or just a shitface whatever you want to call me.