dumb criminals

probably seemed like a good idea to hide in the lagoon until.....

Florida burglary suspect killed by alligator while fleeing from police
http://www.upi.com/Top_News/US/2015/...7451449588188/

BAREFOOT BAY , Fla., Dec. 8 (UPI) -- A man on the run from police after allegedly burglarizing multiple homes in Barefoot Bay, Fla., was found dead of an apparent alligator attack, police said.

Authorities discovered the body of 22-year-old Matthew Riggins on Nov. 23, 10 days after he told his girlfriend he and an accomplice were planning to burglarize homes in Brevard County. The two suspects were last seen running from police to a wooded area. Riggins' girlfriend reported him missing the following day.
Officials identified Riggins' remains Monday.
Dive teams recovering the body encountered the aggressive alligator suspected of killing Riggins. The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission caught and euthanized the animal.

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Originally Posted by baby bear

The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission caught and euthanized the animal.[/I]

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Seems a little extreme

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Originally Posted by Phill

Seems a little extreme

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exactly. that gator should get $100 from crimestoppers

Although our cultural heritage is filled with glorification of commom criminals since Jesse James, (more of a reaction against the elite rich) if you talk to any cop on the beat, let alone any higher up who studies this stuff, they will tell you that, in general, criminals are generally, dumbass.

I tend to think of them as generally of lower intelligence too, except for the few glorified for somewhat more noble reasons as you mentioned - jesse james, robin hood, william tell etc

I remember reading about another hilarious instance of dumb criminals that always makes me laugh to think about-
Robber goes into convenience store and pulls a gun/demands money from the cashier
While the cashier is pulling out the money they're talking to the robber and tells them about a 4 wheeler give-away and says they should sign up
Robber fills out raffle form complete with name address etc and throws it in the box
leaves with money
apprehended at home later
still cracks me up

Alligators- taking a bite out of crime.

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Originally Posted by Viva

Alligators- taking a bite out of crime.

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Da dum tss

All Kidding aside- a pretty good joke tho

This makes an interesting addition to the "florida man..." archives. 11 footer that got testy with the cadaver divers. Found part of florida man inside the gator. Truth stranger than fiction, seems like a Scary Movie subplot.

As a Florida resident for the last 16 years I can tell you that every time I read one of these articles, I am thinking ,"Not Florida, Not Florida, Not... Dammit".
It really is a nice place to live, as long as you aren't in Miami or Orlando. The only explanation I have is that crazy people and dumb criminals like the sun too.

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Originally Posted by warthog

As a Florida resident for the last 16 years I can tell you that every time I read one of these articles, I am thinking ,"Not Florida, Not Florida, Not... Dammit".
It really is a nice place to live, as long as you aren't in Miami or Orlando. The only explanation I have is that crazy people and dumb criminals like the sun too.

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They're not always in florida
Sometimes they are in s carolina or louisiana ;)

https://www.reddit.com/r/floridaman

Once drove straight through from Maine to Florida for a dive trip. Arrived around 2 am, tried to sleep, but the thrashing in the swamp made it hard.

Sometimes nature gets it right.

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Originally Posted by iceman

https://www.reddit.com/r/floridaman

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Easier to follow here: https://twitter.com/_FloridaMan

OMG I forgot how much gold there is to mine in that feed...
Florida Man Crawls Under Cracker Barrel Bathroom Stall to Ask 79-Year-Old Woman to Have Sex With Him

Pure Gold

Always enjoyed those worlds dumbest criminal shows.

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Originally Posted by Tippster

Easier to follow here: https://twitter.com/_FloridaMan

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That, and a good collection of Russian dash cam videos, and my entertainment for the evening is set.

Alligator lives matter

Security Camera Catches Prowling Suspect Licking Doorbell For 3 Hours


https://img.huffingtonpost.com/asset..._720_noupscale

A family in Salinas, California, might be ready to deliver a tongue-lashing to the prowler their security camera caught licking their doorbell ― for three hours.

Sylvia Dungan told local station KION-TV over the weekend the security system alerted the family to strange movement in the early morning.

“I thought, boy there’s a lot of traffic. I go, 5 in the morning? My son doesn’t get home till 6 a.m. Well then who the heck is that?” Dungan said.

She was even more shocked when she watched the video: Hours of a male trespasser licking the doorbell.

“I thought, ‘Oh boy, that is just weird,’” Dungan told CBS Sacrament

The tongue-wagging trespasser didn’t stop there. Police said he also was caught on video appearing to urinate on the front lawn, according to KION.

Police said the suspect, Roberto Daniel Arroyo, 33, could face misdemeanor charges for petty theft and prowling, according to CBS Sacramento. As of Tuesday afternoon, he remained at large.

Dungan said there was no physical damage to her home, but her family spent the rest of the weekend sanitizing their doorbells, according to the station.

I say, I say, there's something wrong with that boy.

That twitter account is gold


https://news.avclub.com/florida-security-guard-documents-farts-online-for-6-mon-

So this month some idiot chased a lady in to a karate dojo while trying to rob her. The idiot left on a stretcher. Some other idiot tried to rob some lady MMA competitor (in Brazil maybe?). That didn't go well for him either..

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Originally Posted by SumJongGuy

So this month some idiot chased a lady in to a karate dojo while trying to rob her. The idiot left on a stretcher. Some other idiot tried to rob some lady MMA competitor (in Brazil maybe?). That didn't go well for him either..

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UFC Fighter Polyana Viana Beats Up Alleged Robber, Shows Him Who’s Boss

Attachment 263475




I've always loved the story about the idiot that broke into LL Cool J's house and got the shit beat out of it by the man himself.

Don't Break Into LL Cool J's House: A Cautionary Tale

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Originally Posted by KQ

...
I've always loved the story about the idiot that broke into LL Cool J's house and got the shit beat out of it by the man himself.

Don't Break Into LL Cool J's House: A Cautionary Tale

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Local Stupidity

https://buckrail.com/wydot-snowplow-...ony-drug-bust/

Lots of criminals are stupid. Including the one in the White House

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Originally Posted by rideit

Local Stupidity

https://buckrail.com/wydot-snowplow-...ony-drug-bust/

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I thought The Three Stooges were dead?

True artists never die

here's another real einstein move
https://buckrail.com/colorado-woman-...roofing-waste/
cliff notes-
dumps hudge pile of roofing debris on BLM
They find a water bottle and paperwork with her name on it

if i were a criminal i would be a dumb criminal

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Originally Posted by b-bear

here's another real einstein move
https://buckrail.com/colorado-woman-...roofing-waste/
cliff notes-
dumps hudge pile of roofing debris on BLM
They find a water bottle and paperwork with her name on it

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The PhD in the lab I worked in dumped a bunch of radioactive sheep carcasses by the side of the road. Fortunately he didn't leave his name.

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Originally Posted by b-bear

here's another real einstein move
https://buckrail.com/colorado-woman-...roofing-waste/
cliff notes-
dumps hudge pile of roofing debris on BLM
They find a water bottle and paperwork with her name on it

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Only a $780 fine!

Police catch Hermiston man who taunted them on Facebook

HERMISTON — A Hermiston man’s gloating on Facebook over escaping arrest was short-lived.

Aaren Antheny Rivera Barrera, 27, was arrested Tuesday in the Hermiston Walmart parking lot on a warrant for felony parole violation. He is being held in Umatilla County Jail without bail.

Barrera ran and successfully hid from Hermiston Police Department officers last Friday when they attempted to serve the arrest warrant. He celebrated by bragging on Whats Happening Hermiston, a popular community Facebook page.

Calling out Officer Mike Ellwood “and his lil’ goons” in a profanity-laced post, he wrote “YOU COULDN’T CATCH ME TODAY EVEN WHEN YOU HAD AN ARMY WITH YOU TIME TO PLAY MARCO POLO.”

Many of the commenters on the post, which has since been deleted, expressed their hope that police would find Barrera soon. On Tuesday they got their wish, as an officer spotted Barrerra in a Mercedes-Benz driven by Austin Leroy James, who was also wanted on a misdemeanor failure to appear warrant, in the Walmart parking lot. Both men were arrested and lodged at the jail.

The police department celebrated with a Facebook post of their own, showing a picture of Barrera in the back of a patrol car with the hashtag #POLO.

“Enjoy your stay and the accommodations with our good friends and fellow goons at the Umatilla County Jail,” Capt. Travis Eynon wrote.

https://scontent.fhhr1-1.fna.fbcdn.n...f9&oe=5DA42990

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Originally Posted by b-bear

here's another real einstein move
https://buckrail.com/colorado-woman-...roofing-waste/
cliff notes-
dumps hudge pile of roofing debris on BLM
They find a water bottle and paperwork with her name on it

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Yes sir officer Obie, I cannot tell a lie...

I put that water bottle and paperwork under that pile of garbage.


Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

Almost the same thing happened near me, a roofer backed his truck into some wooded parkland, dumped the load and drove off - but his license plate got stuck on something and pulled off and when the mess got cleaned up there the plate was at the bottom of the pile

Criminals are generally stupid and therefore unfit to succeed in a straight and narrow world.

Not everyone can be Hans Grüber.

From the list this AM, Milton has never been know to produce rocket scientists. Good chance this could be the PoPo trolling for thieves.


Attachment 289451

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Originally Posted by Vt-Freeheel

From the list this AM, Milton has never been know to produce rocket scientists. Good chance this could be the PoPo trolling for thieves.


Attachment 289451

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That's hysterical.

20 years ago our realtor kept trying to show us places in Milton when we were looking at Georgia and Fairfax, said it was up and coming, whatever that means. We humored her and looked at a few. No thanks.

WTF?


Woman Wanted For Allegedly Peeing On Walmart Potatoes Turns Herself In