I love my wife and all, but Jesus Hercules Christ...

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by spanky

Great thread and definitely an HOF contender.

I'm going to refrain from any of my gripes at the moment, but I will add this...

The thread title got me thinking, "what does the H mean?" A little searching led to...

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesus_H._Christ

---

homo, duh

Why does this thread make me think of this song?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dgjTO5eAbZY

is that the sad one about all the homeless animals?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by stompinlines

So, its similar to being married..
Got it.

---

And yet strangely the opposite is true, despite all of our bitching.

So I'm sitting her right now with Mrs Bad dancer and she just said to me................
"So you know where I've been putting the oil in the car this whole time ?"
Me.....With blank stupified, almost scared look, I respond with, " No... But I am afraid to ask"
"I was putting it into the hole where the dipstick comes out. My brother in law saw me do this showed me where to put it in. Its on top where it says, put oil in here"
Her comment was " well the funnel fit well in the hole"

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by TahoeJ

And yet strangely the opposite is true, despite all of our bitching.

---

It's a pretty safe bet that I'd be dead right now if I wasn't married. I simply wasn't doing what I needed to do for my health and she basically kicked my ass. So there's that.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by bad dancer

So I'm sitting her right now with Mrs Bad dancer and she just said to me................
"So you know where I've been putting the oil in the car this whole time ?"

---

As the man of the house your pride lets her do this how?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by iceman

It's a pretty safe bet that I'd be dead right now if I wasn't married. I simply wasn't doing what I needed to do for my health and she basically kicked my ass. So there's that.

---

So...you're saying this is improvement? or a fail?

Live fast; Die young; Leave a good-looking corpse

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by iceman

It's a pretty safe bet that I'd be dead right now if I wasn't married. I simply wasn't doing what I needed to do for my health and she basically kicked my ass. So there's that.

---

Amen to this.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by powtario

As the man of the house your pride lets her do this how?

---

Hey.....she checks the oil and fills it when needed. No pride issues here.
I'ts her car.
The car always has oil in it at least. I guess it's method of delivery to the engine case varies depending n who fills it. Who knew ?

Well I thought you were gonna say she was putting it in the radiator or the windshield fluid reservoir, so the dipstick tube isn't that bad.

http://grouchyoldcripple.com/wp/wp-c.../addingoil.gif

12345

That looks good for an engine fire. Guess she wants the car totaled?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by iceman

Well I thought you were gonna say she was putting it in the radiator or the windshield fluid reservoir, so the dipstick tube isn't that bad.

---

That was my first thought. I was dreading that as well.

Who owns a funnel that small? Where do these ideas even come from?

This week for instance: "Do you know where the passenger pickup is?" (in the airport)
"Yes, take that escalator up a level"
"Oh, the one by the big passenger pickup sign with an arrow?"

Today: "So, where do I pickup my order."
"Just to your left underneath the big pickup order sign."

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by iceman

Lots of people can't drive in snow.

Only a wife could drive 150 miles on the highway in 4WD on dry pavement when the last thing I said as she left was "Please please please do NOT forget to put it in 2WD when you get to the top of the driveway."

---

Here's a pic of an exploded transfer case in a Cherokee that the wife had driven in 4wD on dry pavement:

http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/...bfbsihetaa.jpg

Find out yesterday she's been driving with the low tire pressure light on for over a month.

When I ask why she states "because when it gets cold it always come on"

C'MON MAN!!!

Took my wife's car in for service recently. When I picked it up I noticed the side mirror was basically destroyed. I went in to tell them and they denied it. I had to get back to the office so I couldn't call the cops but I was going to after work to file a report.

I called the wife to tell her. "Oh...I might have hit something "

No kidding?


Sent from the other side

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by BS720

Can ex-gf's qualify in this thread?

---

"Have we gone through Texas yet?"
We were in North Carolina, Driving from Taos, NM.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by tBatt

"Have we gone through Texas yet?"
We were in North Carolina, Driving from Taos, NM.

---

to be fair it was only 177m out of 1,767m. Easy to miss.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by AK47bp

Find out yesterday she's been driving with the low tire pressure light on for over a month.

When I ask why she states "because when it gets cold it always come on"

C'MON MAN!!!

---

check spare

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by AK47bp

Find out yesterday she's been driving with the low tire pressure light on for over a month.

When I ask why she states "because when it gets cold it always come on"

C'MON MAN!!!

---

I just noticed my wife's car had a very low tire; I couldn't even get it to register on a pressure gauge. Asked her if her light was on; "Yeah, it's always on." There's a nail head clearly visible right above the stem. Hon, you might want to get that fixed.

I have to admit I get some sort of odd amusement from watching a bunch of maggots assert intrinsic superiority over roughly half the human race. A sad and twisted kind of amusement. But amusement nonetheless.

I'd love to hear the tales from the other side of some of these marital entities... ;)

Paging babybear, altagirl, etc.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by spindrift

I have to admit I get some sort of odd amusement from watching a bunch of maggots assert intrinsic superiority over roughly half the human race. A sad and twisted kind of amusement. But amusement nonetheless.

I'd love to hear the tales from the other side of some of these marital entities... ;)

---

Your wife reads TGR, cool.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by spindrift

I have to admit I get some sort of odd amusement from watching a bunch of maggots assert intrinsic superiority over roughly half the human race. A sad and twisted kind of amusement. But amusement nonetheless.

I'd love to hear the tales from the other side of some of these marital entities... ;)

---

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by iceman

Your wife reads TGR, cool.

---

Right? Have her post up!

I can't post anything.
I spent the day trying to figure out how to tell my wife that I need to change two of her tires because I put them on backwards. And I have to do it tonight, because she's taking the car to the shop in the morning, and they'll tell her.

Anyone want to buy my wife's car? It only has minor to major damage on front and rear right side and left side quarter panels. Much of the rear bumper is the same color as my neighbors' Prius. It manages to get us to our final destination two out of every three road trips. All reasonable offers entertained.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Caucasian Asian

I can't post anything.
I spent the day trying to figure out how to tell my wife that I need to change two of her tires because I put them on backwards. And I have to do it tonight, because she's taking the car to the shop in the morning, and they'll tell her.

---

That is a 10 to 12 second job for the Nascar crews.... Have to have an air wrench though...

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Caucasian Asian

I can't post anything.
I spent the day trying to figure out how to tell my wife that I need to change two of her tires because I put them on backwards. And I have to do it tonight, because she's taking the car to the shop in the morning, and they'll tell her.

---

Not following... you mounted your own tires backwards? Who mounts their own tires? Besides Benny, I mean.. Or did you put the wheels on backwards? Is that even possible?

directional tires. I think he means he didn't pay attention when bolting up the wheels? which can happen pretty easily.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by stfu&gbtw

Not following... you mounted your own tires backwards? Who mounts their own tires? Besides Benny, I mean.. Or did you put the wheels on backwards? Is that even possible?

---

Put the tire that is for the left side on the right side and vice versa, tread is wrong direction.

Hmmm, I don't remember parking like this.

http://i177.photobucket.com/albums/w...psr5ky0b4k.jpg

Maybe she was trying to kill the weeds? Bummer Roundup is illegal in yer hood.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by RShea

That is a 10 to 12 second job for the Nascar crews.... Have to have an air wrench though...

---

Air wrench and multiple jacks.

I managed to change three tires in just under 10 minutes, when I went out to clean the cat litter. So I won't have to tell her now.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Caucasian Asian

Air wrench and multiple jacks.

I managed to change three tires in just under 10 minutes, when I went out to clean the cat litter. So I won't have to tell her now.

---

Nope- only a single jack goes across the wall in Nascar.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by iceman

directional tires. I think he means he didn't pay attention when bolting up the wheels? which can happen pretty easily.

---

Yeah, sorry. Duh...That's what I get for posting in between sessions of projectile vomiting. Was seriously stumped on that one!

Thank you so much for this thread. It makes me feel so much better after being newly single after a 6 year relationship. Learned many important lessons today: expect less under certain circumstances, demand more in others but to primarily bite my tongue when I find the next right one.

8^}
Embrace the differences.

i luvs her and it's my fault for creating an all about the ups good snow snob
and it's your 1st tour of the season
but it shouldn't take 5 minutes to falling leaf some man made cat chunder for a couple hundy feet
http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y19...psuegkawp3.jpg
:D