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My wife is 1st gen Italian. Her father owned an Italian bakery/restaurant and she couldn't cook to save her life. It baffles me at times but what can you do? However I'm okay with this, as she happily (yes happily, she likes to clean) keeps our home spotless on a regular/daily basis. This includes bathrooms, makes bed daily, all laundry/linens, floors and some dishes. I'll happily cook and enjoy a clean home.
And what's with all the talking?......sheesh
My wife thinks anything can go down a disposal. She would chip branches in there if she could.
Since we met 12 years ago, she has clogged the disposal at least 4 times. Clogged, as in full disassembly required. Bucket required. Scooping shit out of dismantled disposal required. Ropo Vieja was the best one. Took hours to get that shit out of the pipes.
If I count your standard jam, we are at at least 15 times. Did you know you can use an allen key to unjam a disposal? Look at the bottom of the unit- there is a spot to put an allen key and turn the blades until the key, quarter, ring, bone, paper clip, rock, etc, is cleared from the blades. Marriage has taught me so many things.
Love you honey.
Not the wife, but a compilation from a few girlfriends
Placing the cap on juice (or other liquid) containers so that when I shake it it splashes everywhere
Vacuuming with just the hose - no extension. Kneeling on the floor, using a 1.5" diameter hose to vaccum the whole damn house. Just about every damn day. And missing just about every piece of dirt. And then leaving it plugged in, in the middle of the room, with cords and hose spread everywhere
Using a large jug of laundry detergent (that clearly states on the label that it's good for 60 or 100 or however many loads) and a whole bottle of dish soap every two weeks, and bitching that I don't buy laundry detergent or dish soap. And I still have to rewash most of the dishes I use because she can't get them clean. She also uses entire rolls of paper towel to mop the floor (we have two mops) or do other cleaning, and bitches I don't buy those, either.
Refusing to have interior lights in car on because she is afraid it will drain the battery. Even though there is clearly a switch that will make them only turn on when the door is open.
Um. Yes?Quote:
Originally Posted by warthog
Thought that was common knowledge. They come with one when you buy them.
mine used to be that way when she was the girlfriend because I didn't use to care about helping! She is really smart but lazy as hell, and these days can't even google or connect hew phone to hotel's wifi!Quote:
Originally Posted by splitinbend
drives me crazy!
My wife never comes on TGR, but there's still no way in hell I'm posting anything negative about her. Always knows whats up, and it usually ends up badly for me.
Well yer fucked now.Quote:
Originally Posted by huckbucket
I never purchased one new. Always came with the house. After I totally took one apart just to clear a jam, someone told me about it. Totally makes sense, but if the house comes with it, it is something you would never think about. Plus, I have never jammed one. When I hear a crazy metallic ruckus going on in there, I shut it off and get the ruckus maker out. My other half tries to grind the sound away.Quote:
Originally Posted by iceman
Huckbucket- I hear ya, but this is a regular conversation in our house. I am too Italian to shut my mouth. That whole "yes dear" bullshit has escaped me. She has her list, I have mine. Luckily, they are equally stupid things, so it is a wash.
"My bike is on top of the car."
"I know"
"...Don't park in the garage"
"Why?"
"....because my bikes on top of the car."
"....I know...."
CRUNCH!
My wife is Sicilian too. Love her to death, but that shit should be outlawed.Quote:
Originally Posted by warthog
That bike on car story may be the hardest story yet... condolences.
It's not boring. So you got that going for ya.Quote:
Originally Posted by huckbucket
My wife never logs into TGR either, but fuck it. Everybody needs to vent. What's next? You going to give up beating off? I gave up strange and busting my nut all over a girl's face, but I didn't give up wanting to...Quote:
Originally Posted by huckbucket
wowQuote:
Originally Posted by nickwm21
That seems just about ideal. I need to pay a fucking cleaning lady...Quote:
Originally Posted by splitinbend
We drive a Volkswagon. They actually come stock with these lights on so we don't worry about them. Its easier that way.Quote:
Originally Posted by Flyoverland Captive
glorious.Quote:
Originally Posted by nickwm21
Took a girlfriend to a friend's birthday party, when she asked where my friend lived I said "the boonies". Weeks later while hanging out with that friend, the hometown of the friend came up in conversation. To which my ladyfriend replied "But I thought you lived in the boonies?" looked so great standing at my arm tho
I do everything repair-wise in my house; after 20+ years of this, I decided to let her tackle the problem she consistently creates, the clogged disposal. I stepped back and said nothing while she bought a new unit and tried to install it. After hours of frustration, she finally asked for my help. I hooked it up in minutes, then pointed out the Alan wrench trick. Instead of "thanks for your help", I got "why the fuck didn't you tell me that hours ago?"Quote:
Originally Posted by warthog
You cannot win; thus, alcohol.
you guys are reliving my last ten years
Quote:
Originally Posted by stfu&gbtw
no kidding
guy sounds like he's dead
haha this made me laugh. Sadly, I can relate. And she leaves the damn thing running the entire time she's washing dishes. Drives me nuts.Quote:
Originally Posted by warthog
There was a little bit of artistic license in my post ... :wink:Quote:
Originally Posted by SKIORFORGETIT
FWIW, I now just beat off in front of my wife and she records it.
#winningQuote:
Originally Posted by huckbucket
I read somewhere that the MTBF on disposers is like 3 hours of running time total, i.e. they're only engineered to run 3 hours before crapping out. That's a pretty long time when you run it 10 seconds at a pop, not so long when you run it 10 minutes every time.Quote:
Originally Posted by jmerrey