About to turn 50 and am too tired to continue

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Buzzworthy

It’s another day. I’m trying a little more today.
I’m embarrassed as all get out. But thank you.

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Dude, it took courage to reach out. Feel good about that.
Hope tomorrow is better than today
ETA - bunch of folks beat me to it

Well for fucks sake, reading through this thread had me tearing up big time. This place and all you weirdo dentists are amazing. I’ve met a few people from here, but it really is a weird, great little community.

Buzz, I feel everything you said, and I’m glad you said it all. I don’t know you at all, but I’ve seen your posts over the years. I lost my 17 year old a year ago. The pain I feel every day is unreal. Some days it’s a struggle to get out of bed. Our lives have been turned upside down forever. There is no positive spin on that. At this point, I live for my wife, my other kid, and my friends and family that are still around. I couldn’t do anything that would hurt them, by hurting myself. Otherwise I would probably go out, fear and loathing style. I don’t know where I’m going with this really, but if you don’t improve the situation for yourself, do it for the ones that love you ( which somehow includes a bunch of over analyzing, binding and weird ski hoarding, bunch of good guys and gals that are always there when it counts)

Sounds like I’m a little late to the party and you are moving toward a better space. Good on you for using your voice and talking it out. You got a lot of friends that you don’t even know and we’re all behind you

Quote:

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Originally Posted by t-the-east

Well for fucks sake, reading through this thread had me tearing up big time. This place and all you weirdo dentists are amazing. I’ve met a few people from here, but it really is a weird, great little community.

I lost my 17 year old a year ago. The pain I feel every day is unreal. Some days it’s a struggle to get out of bed. Our lives have been turned upside down forever. There is no positive spin on that.

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Dude, I'm so sorry.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by gravitylover

Dude, I'm so sorry.

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This.

Thanks fellas. It’s brutal. I try and just keep goin. Keep busy. Keep distracted. I haven’t even mentioned it here before, I couldn’t even really talk about it to most people til the “one year anniversary” had come and gone. But I guess my point is, to Buzz, a lot of us are going through some awful, awful shit, and somehow, we are all here to help and support each other.. and the last thing I want to do is take away the focus of this thread, which is helping Buzz to continue enjoying shredding and living The best life he can

I mean if you guys need any advice on loafers don’t be shy…


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t, my god, I’m so sorry to hear this, if i see you at a Phish show this summer, big hug coming your way.
Keep on Keeping on

Buzz, just wanted you to know that as one of the true OGs around here, I've always respected you and your input and opinions.

Just wanted to say a couple other things that came to mind also; first, I'm 48 and I still need MY Dad... I rely on him all the time for all kinds of things, and I have for my entire adult life. I promise you that your "kid" still needs you - a lot.

Second, and I don't know if this will help you at all - feel free to disregard - but this helped me; a gratefulness journal. Its really not all that hard; every day, force yourself to write down 5 things you're grateful for. They don't have to be big things, they can be things like;
Clean drinking water
My Dog
My eyesight
TGR kooks
Favorite cereal this morning
Hot wood stove on a cold day
Paid time off
Took a good shit this morning
My wife
Still have a full head of hair
My truck
Roof over my head
My 12" cock
etc etc. If you can't do 5, do 3. The point is to force yourself to focus - if only briefly - on things in your life that are good, every day. It seems stupid, but... it worked. For me anyhow.

Also agree with everyone who said "talk to someone" - ideally someone with letters after their name, but even if only us dweebs. The more you can unload, the better you usually feel. Clearly there is no judgement here, because most (all?) of us have first hand experience with depression and know how much it truly sucks.

^ Wait, are you bragging about your 12” member?
Or is it someone else's that you’re thankful for?
NTTAWWT

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Originally Posted by chicken feathers

^ Wait, are you bragging about your 12” member?
Or is it someone else's that you’re thankful for?
NTTAWWT

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Dammit, I fixed it - figuring this exact response - but you were too quick :mad:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by TBS

Dude, it took courage to reach out. Feel good about that.

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This. You've got far bigger cajones than I do, that's for sure.

Living life at 11 means it's hard to hear the music when it's at a 4. Some days are 1s and 2s, or worse. All you can do is reach out for help and I'm glad and grateful that you did.

Go see some live music. It's one of the most powerful remedies in my toolbox.

Sent from my SM-S928U1 using Tapatalk

Quote:

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Originally Posted by t-the-east

Thanks fellas. It’s brutal. I try and just keep goin. Keep busy. Keep distracted. I haven’t even mentioned it here before, I couldn’t even really talk about it to most people til the “one year anniversary” had come and gone. But I guess my point is, to Buzz, a lot of us are going through some awful, awful shit, and somehow, we are all here to help and support each other.. and the last thing I want to do is take away the focus of this thread, which is helping Buzz to continue enjoying shredding and living The best life he can

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Dude that is heavy stuff. So sorry you and your family experienced that/have to live with that. Good for you though for sharing that and sharing what works for you so you can help another mag out.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by t-the-east

Thanks fellas. It’s brutal. I try and just keep goin. Keep busy. Keep distracted. I haven’t even mentioned it here before, I couldn’t even really talk about it to most people til the “one year anniversary” had come and gone. But I guess my point is, to Buzz, a lot of us are going through some awful, awful shit, and somehow, we are all here to help and support each other.. and the last thing I want to do is take away the focus of this thread, which is helping Buzz to continue enjoying shredding and living The best life he can

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A day at a time is about all I could do. It does get a little easier as time goes on.

It's coming up on the five year anniversary of when we lost our 19 year old. I don't have any special advice. It just sucks.

Buzz, sorry for derailing any of this thread. We are all in this together, somehow, in some way.

Just wanted to check in, buzz (and others) I don’t know you but I know things get tough. I was wishy washy on replying but after reading through more and more comments of support and love and stoke I realize most of us are here for similar reasons, and we all share an understanding and compassion toward fellow mags. This place and the people here are amazing. You are amazing. Difficult pasts, difficult situations and darkness, but I hope you see some light and feel some warmth soon. If you ever need anyone to talk you shoot me a PM and I’ll text you my number.

Sorry T-The-East….no words. But your words of living for others are very very true. Wish you any peace you may find.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by OldLarry

I mean if you guys need any advice on loafers don’t be shy…


Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

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Huaraches can save a man’s soul.

Or sole.

Or both.

Fact.

Buzz, here's one more internet stranger who's glad, relieved, that you're okay today. One day at a time... you got this.

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Originally Posted by dannynoonan

Buzz, here's one more internet stranger who's glad, relieved, that you're okay today. One day at a time... you got this.

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I like you, Betty.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Buzzworthy

It’s a new day. I’ve read every word and my thank yous are nothing to what you all have done here. I’ll never ever be able to thank you enough.

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now March 2 (2024)

+1

hang in -


skiJ / tj

Quote:

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Originally Posted by t-the-east

Well for fucks sake, reading through this thread had me tearing up big time. This place and all you weirdo dentists are amazing. I’ve met a few people from here, but it really is a weird, great little community.

Buzz, I feel everything you said, and I’m glad you said it all. I don’t know you at all, but I’ve seen your posts over the years. I lost my 17 year old a year ago. The pain I feel every day is unreal. Some days it’s a struggle to get out of bed. Our lives have been turned upside down forever. There is no positive spin on that. At this point, I live for my wife, my other kid, and my friends and family that are still around. I couldn’t do anything that would hurt them, by hurting myself. Otherwise I would probably go out, fear and loathing style. I don’t know where I’m going with this really, but if you don’t improve the situation for yourself, do it for the ones that love you ( which somehow includes a bunch of over analyzing, binding and weird ski hoarding, bunch of good guys and gals that are always there when it counts)

Sounds like I’m a little late to the party and you are moving toward a better space. Good on you for using your voice and talking it out. You got a lot of friends that you don’t even know and we’re all behind you

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I appreciate your post t-

my geographic community lost a 17 year old HS Senior ( now 16 in the Class of 2024 ) on January 18, 2024.

my Condolences. ! and my empathy and my ,,, sorrow !

I appreciate your post - Thank You.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by El Chupacabra

A day at a time is about all I could do. It does get a little easier as time goes on.

It's coming up on the five year anniversary of when we lost our 19 year old. I don't have any special advice. It just sucks.

Buzz, sorry for derailing any of this thread. We are all in this together, somehow, in some way.

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Chup- I remember. ...

- - -

This thread may extend my life. Thank you, Buzz-

( I've) been here a long time. mostly, I don't feel worthy. But I love this place. !

going back to court on Tuesday - nine years related to my parents' estates ( 2016/2017 for Dad; 2018 for my mother ) ;

God, I Hate court.


LBL, Dj, Harry, Bunion, sfb, yeti- (I-AS), -face, Jax, ,,, splat !!!! friends to me. mir - A muse. babybear. / ( the magg. in W2, KQ ! !!! )

Thank you.

My great friend said, ' Stay strong, my friend. take it one day at a time. This shall pass '


here's my contribution >>

Dad raised me on, 'This too shall pass... '
I heard it so many times. . . ( it lost meaning to me )

And when I needed to encourage young friends in 2012, it came back to me - and

the genuinely hopeless situations my father lived through ! !!


also, Kipling's, "IF"

' IF you can keep your head about you, while those around you are losing theirs and blaming you...
( and )
IF you can treat Triumph and Disaster as the Imposters they are ( and go on... )

IF you can Risk everything in 'Pitch-and-Toss', and lose everything, ( and go on... )


TBS. goddamn.


"breathe Deep(-ly) " and

' Find your way through ! !!! ' are the best pieces of advice I have received in the last twenty years...

( Churchill. ' If you find yourself in Hell, Keep Going. ' I believe ( something like that ) )

so, Thank you.


peace. skiJ / tj

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mazderati

Recommended yesterday. A surprising win for the algorithm.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amXl7FG7J4c

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Thank you so much for this, really what I needed right now. I'm crying, but in a good way.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by skiJ

LBL, Dj, Harry, Bunion, sfb, yeti- (I-AS), -face, Jax, ,,, splat !!!! friends to me. mir - A muse. babybear. / ( the magg. in W2, KQ ! !!! )

Thank you.

My great friend said, ' Stay strong, my friend. take it one day at a time. This shall pass '


here's my contribution >>

Dad raised me on, 'This too shall pass... '
I heard it so many times. . . ( it lost meaning to me )

And when I needed to encourage young friends in 2012, it came back to me - and

the genuinely hopeless situations my father lived through ! !!


also, Kipling's, "IF"

' IF you can keep your head about you, while those around you are losing theirs and blaming you...
( and )
IF you can treat Triumph and Disaster as the Imposters they are ( and go on... )

IF you can Risk everything in 'Pitch-and-Toss', and lose everything, ( and go on... )


TBS. goddamn.


"breathe Deep(-ly) " and

' Find your way through ! !!! ' are the best pieces of advice I have received in the last twenty years...

( Churchill. ' If you find yourself in Hell, Keep Going. ' I believe ( something like that ) )

so, Thank you.


peace. skiJ / tj

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I see you there. :yourock:

Ok, maybe this one will be useful to somebody, really helped me when I got wound up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VsACFEO6dG8

Quote:

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Originally Posted by shera

I see you there. :yourock:

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thanks ! And Thank you, shera ! !!

(( If I routed through CO in March 2025 on my way to montana,
would you take two runs with me (?) ))

skiJ / tj

I could prolly manage two. :D

How’s Buzz doin? Been a few days since we’ve heard from him I believe

Moved to slab city to make art.

Sold everything, got a 89 suburban, insulated Carhartt one piece and 10- 30 blocks of Utica club.

Living well.

Thanks, mir-

ski You next year ! !


skiJ

Quote:

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Originally Posted by byates1

Moved to slab city to make art.

Sold everything, got a 89 suburban, insulated Carhartt one piece and 10- 30 blocks of Utica club.

Living well.

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You sold the van ! ? ??

( wow )

Please
Be Safe, -yates ! !!

skiJ

Man, this may or may not be good advice, but here's an idea:

Go to a third-world developing country and volunteer to do something. Like with Red Cross. First, you'll see that your life does not suck nearly as bad as it could. Second, you may find some unexpected joy helping other people.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by skiJ

Thanks, mir-

ski You next year ! !


skiJ

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otay!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Hott Butt Mud

Man, this may or may not be good advice, but here's an idea:

Go to a third-world developing country

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User name checks out

Quote:

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Originally Posted by t-the-east

How’s Buzz doin? Been a few days since we’ve heard from him I believe

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Appreciate you. Im still trying to dig out. Still very down. Going to the aquarium with my girls in a bit, my daughter would like me to go with her.

I don't know you, Buzz, but like a lot of others here, sending you some positive energy. This weird community supports each other, hope you get a little bump from it and take it a day at a time.

Hey, we all gotta remember. No good without the bad. If there were no ups and downs, there would be just flat blandness. Recognize the good, appreciate, and do what you can to minimize the bad. Something you realize causing you pain or grief, figure out how to reduce or eliminate. I cut booze cause I realized it was causing me pain and grief.
Know that when there are bad times there will also be good times.
Keep on keeping on everybody.

I started this graciousness moment thing awhile back as another poster mentioned, as I was getting overwhelmed with life stuff. Man I kinda hated it since I have a natural aversion and skepticism to self help horseshit. Then it kinda started to grow on me. Started to consider little things in my life that I’m fortunate to have. Now I try to do it before I pick up my phone first thing in the morning and it’s been a solid and quick addition to my day even for a pessimistic dude like me.


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Sorta harsh, but pretty brilliant too:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1BVrgIc3fL4

The only clip of this I could find has Russian subtitles. As a piece on depression, alcohol and suicide probably should.

It might sound trite but take a moment to contemplate and appreciate the miracle of your existence.


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Hey Buzz-

What’s shakin’?

Continue continuing por favor