Hahahahahaha... my thoughts exactly. If you're not into sloppy seconds, well... just imagine that scenario.Quote:
Originally Posted by Dantheman
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Hahahahahaha... my thoughts exactly. If you're not into sloppy seconds, well... just imagine that scenario.Quote:
Originally Posted by Dantheman
Somehow I don't think the previous tongue is what you should be concerned about in that situation....Quote:
Originally Posted by TahoeJ
The Le Mans 24 hour race used to have one out near tetra rouge.
I vaguely remember going there a couple of times.
BevÂ’s backstreet lounge
Van dyke and Davison
Detroit.
As long as you werenÂ’t sitting at the bar, they let you smoke weed in there. But they turned a blind eye to rolling joints or blunts on the bar itself. Go sit at the rickety small table with the torn old banquet hall chairs in the corner and it was cool.
So it’s like the second time I’m ever in this place and I’ve already made a friend. She was cool, seriously a really nice girl. Built like Beyoncé. Swear. I never got dances from her because... that’s just not my thing... but if I brought a friend in I would buy him dances from her. We would just bullshit and I would buy her drinks and we would smoke weed and that was it.
The bar had an L in it and I sat on the short side right next to the DJ. Just across from the dj were the swinging saloon type doors going into the vip. This place is dirty. Even by my standards. I LOVE shitty strip bars.
My new friend is sitting next to me at the bar and sheÂ’s telling me about this one girl all the other girls are mad at because sheÂ’s just sucking dudes off left and right in the VIP. Not a lot of big spenders in this particular club. And all the money was going to the blow job chick. VIP doors swing open and you can see plain as day this girl on her knees in the other room. The VIP was just one small room wrapped in a shitty couch type thing so when the door opened you could basically see everything in there.
There’s a great ludacris song, don’t know what it’s called but probably ‘yous a hoe’ And Luda says ‘yous a hooooooooe’. A bunch of times in this long low voice.... when blow job girl got called on stage. She danced to 2.5 min of nothing but Luda saying ‘yous a hoooooooooe’... the dj just kept pulling back the record or whatever to make it repeat ‘yous a how’ for 2.5 min.
Supu in the house!!! Nice.
My friend got kicked out at my bachelor party. She was getting too handsy with the strippers.
This was the night before my wedding and my friends' wives were with us. The second we walked in, the entire stage shifted to the side we were on. 2 of the wives were way into it. Hell of a night.
Whoaaaa!!!!! Punani abides!!!!
that was my first strip club experience, eons ago. a break from two-a-days preseason football. i think the place had just opened and my roommate took a few of us there as a surprise.Quote:
Originally Posted by mtnjam
Bachelorette parties? Way to read the room dumbfuck chatbot.Quote:
Originally Posted by m3928b
Haha!
Anyone ever been to Art’s Performing Center in Milwaukee just down the street from the Center for the Performing Arts?
The best stripper stories are the ones you can't tell anyone.
Ever been to the OG??? I went and have a 15 minute story but this one is an easy cut and paste.
http://now8news.com/crazed-man-attac...he-aids-virus/
Las Vegas, NV – A Las Vegas man is now under arrest after a heinous attack on several females at a Las Vegas strip club. Frederick Manson, 34, arrived at the Olympic Gardens Gentlemen’s Club in the early morning hours of February 17th with several thousand dollars. He requested dance after dance and spent nearly $3000 in two hours, according to reports. It was around 4:30 AM he began getting “very agitated” and telling the girls that they “reminded him of his mother, a cheap whore.”
That’s when eyewitnesses say Manson retrieved several needles from his fanny pack and began stabbing the girls, one by one, injecting them with the fluid inside the syringe. According to reports, he was yelling, “Now you have AIDS like my cheap whore mother who danced on a stage like this while she was pregnant with me. I was born in a strip club and no one even cares! I hate you b*tches!!” Manson injected 11 girls before he was tackled by club security. The police were called, and the crazed man was taken into custody.
The women were transported to University Medical Center, where they underwent disease testing. Although 8 out of the 11 test came back negative for HIV/ AIDS, doctors say it could take several months before it is present in the blood. The other three females did test positive for the HIV virus. however, doctors cannot conclude whether they had already contracted the disease prior to the attack or, if it was a result of the attack.
Manson, who had a previous stay in a mental hospital in June 2015, is being held at the Clark County detention Center on no bond, awaiting charges. Toxicology reports have confirmed the syringes contained blood tainted with the AIDS virus.
Sharing is caring!
Holeeeee fuck
Attachment 458769
My story ends with a German tourist being stabbed by a bouncer, which made the local tv news.
Jeezus. Manson was his name?
Man, does trouble follow you around or do you follow trouble???
Okay here is a happy story after I killed the mood.
NO CLIFFS because its an awesome tail of redemption or something.
https://postgradproblems.com/exclusi...s-and-cocaine/
Attachment 458770
Trouble finds me, I find it.Quote:
Originally Posted by riser4
I like to have a story to tell now and then.
I feel like that Mexico story could be woven into a fastfred post somehow.
How does one manage to inject 11 people against their will? That’s nuts.Quote:
Originally Posted by exsparky
Is it possible for an AIDS test to pickup an infection that quickly? Or did they already have it?
Didn't you see the last item in the timeline? "Moved to a mountain town to ski bum, bought a house and somehow wound up as a contractor banging my clients' wives and smoking a fuckton of weed. Still off the coke and hookers though."Quote:
Originally Posted by Timberridge
Back in the 90s, a buddy of mine was the organizer for a bach party for his co-worker to be held at a somewhat warehouse derelict loft that one of our mutual friends lived in. Huge space and the site of many unrelated debauched nights. Not sure why, but somehow I got invited to witness the carnage. Prob 30 or so guys and 6 scorching hot strippers.
Toward the end of the night, there was some suggestion that the bach get his balls shaved by the strippers. Luckily for the groom, he was adamant that that was a bad idea and he wasn’t drunk enough to get talked into it
Unfortunately, my friend that did the organizing was much more inebriated. Attention turned toward him as the potential victim and being the dirtbag he was gladly submitted to letting the strippers depants him, foam him up, and shave his balls. Piss in your pants laughter ensued
Later next day, hungover af, I called him to see if he was alive. When I asked how his balls were doing , he really had no idea what I was talking about and got pretty angry and pissed off when i said dude, u got yiur balls shaved by strippers. Don’t tell me you don’t remember that! A couple more exchanges w him calling me a liar and i said fine, Im a liar, but you can check out it yourself. It then got real quiet for a couple of seconds, followed by him screaming WHAT THE FUCK
Thread popped up in my feed and reminded me of an article from 2013:
Wildcatting: A Stripper’s Guide to the Modern American Boomtown
Nothing is more emblematic of the American dream than chaotic mining and drilling towns such as Williston, North Dakota, and the people who flock to them in search of fortune. And no one knows better how these communities work — and don’t — than the traveling topless dancer.
I went to a surgical convention in New Orlean. Walking down Bourbon St one night there was a crowd gathered outside an open door looking in--all in blue blazers and either khaki or gray wool pants, the unofficial uniform of surgeons "out on the town". Some were still wearing convention name tags. What were they watching--a dancer on the stage of an otherwise empty bar. I'd call her a stripper, except I doubt she had had any clothes to strip off, The only thing she had on was shoes. It was funny to see these guys gawking from the doorway but unwilling to go in.
That was you?!Quote:
Originally Posted by exsparky
Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums
That news source is pretty susQuote:
Originally Posted by exsparky
Do hooker stories count?
I took a rich kid to Peru once, his dad was a client. I told the concierge not to let him out of the building. He’d last 5 minutes out on the streets of Lima at night. So he flagged a hooker down from the balcony. While I was looking for him, he took her upstairs and she cleaned Out my wallet and left.
Punk told me the next day “you can’t tell my Daddy, it would be bad for your business’. I almost left him in the middle of the desert for dead.
Before I get into this... Anyone else here ever been to a place outside of Acapulco that might be referred to as 'the compound'? You might remember the machine gun armed guards opening a fairly well fortified gate. I spent a week there one night.
Your journey may have begun with a 'connected' taxi driver whose magical powers allow him to drive untold miles well below the "E"mpy indicator. There may have been attempt to use an extremely suspicious ATM in roughly the same disturbing setting as the movie Hostel; an ATM that requires an appointment and a phonecall. Maybe not? But certainly you'd remember your handler concierge proudly boast: "gentlemen, here, you can have anything. There are no limits". He will have been proven correct.
I went to a strip club once on a date with a couple of couples. There was a lady there who could really twirl the tassels on her pasties by golly.
I've got a funny one from when I went to a strip club in Dallas with some friends. It was one of those nights we didn’t plan anything; we just ended up there. So, we’re sitting around, having a few drinks, and this one dancer comes over and starts chatting with us.
I got excited when I glanced and thought Timberridge bumped his thread.
Need to talk to someone about Bailey Zappe and he was our go-to source.
Well.....while walking down Main St a looong time ago when fairly new to town, a 'clueless' lady acquaintance stopped me and asked if I wanted to strip for a bachelorette party. The bride to be was a friend and the participants were all friends/acquaintances, including my future wife. I declined, not sure if I should be flattered or offended and was wondering WTF was she thinking...or not?:eek:
I forgot to tell the story with Winston and Felix that ended with zah Germans getting stabbed. That was a good one too.Quote:
Originally Posted by exsparky
Tangential story:
I finished a mountain bike race and was in the group shower afterwards and see the guy next to me is bleeding profusely from his abdomen. I’m like holy shit dude what happened - bad wipeout?
He was like “no I got stabbed during the race”
He was naked so it’s kinda like a stripper story?
Quote:
Originally Posted by BmillsSkier
you think it was his love of fast motorcycles, or fine italian motor cars that lead to his untimely demise?
i think frank from the op came back around and finished him off.Quote:
Originally Posted by m2711c
Brother in laws bachelor party in New Orleans. The Cabaret, 4 stages in different rooms/floors. He is drunk as F and crawls onto a stage. The party gets kicked out and moves on completely forgetting me. I wind up with two cute twin sisters and about to book a room when they come to retrieve me hours later.
Boy I hope not.Quote:
Originally Posted by m2711c
He did always say that if this place stopped being fun he'd see himself out - and I think that happened right about when the login issues/general usability issues here popped up earlier in the year.
Wherever he is, I hope Tedski is there as well.
Maybe even Jer too.
Denver Bronco's player was shot twice after a night at Shot Gun Willy's. I've never been, but it sounds like a regular occurrence.
https://www.cpr.org/2024/10/24/bronc...to-strip-club/
Friend's bachelor party. Groom's boss was a pseudo high roller in town; owned a bar, and liked to conspicuously spend money. So the group started at the boss's bar where he was buying the table lots of high end shots and that sort of thing. A couple of mountain town 6's showed up and inserted themselves into the mix. Then one of those obnoxious stretched Escalades showed up and starting carting the whole ensemble around to various bars.
Once the group was sufficiently loose, the Escalade took us to the strip joint. Things began to devolve. One member of the group refused to enter because stripping is degrading to women. He found a corner of the parking lot where he could call his girlfriend and complain. While acknowledging the basic correctness of his morals, the rest of the group went inside to look at titties. The two girls that latched on earlier accompanied us.
A collection was taken for the strippers to do their thing with the groom. $300 or so was enough for a gaggle of the establishment's top talent to conduct a topless assault on the groom. They dragged him up on stage, spanked him a bit, etc. This being a mountain town, the top talent at this institution was mid-grade at best, but everyone was having a good time. The groom was a good sport about being slapped around on stage, and our group had lined up in some comfy chairs off to one side to spectate. There weren't many other patrons, so we more or less had the run of the place.
At some point, the strippers tie the groom to a chair, take his shirt off, and start drawing on him with markers. Hearts, penises, etc. are drawn on his chest and neck. They untie him, put him on the ground, and start riding him like a horse. The groom is over it, so he becomes a more aggressive horse, ultimately bucking one of the strippers off his back. The bouncers see that this is devolving and interject themselves into the situation. The groom, sensing trouble and seeing a safe landing, decides to stage dive into our crowd of bachelor partiers, which results in a pile of bodies and chairs scattering around the establishment.
This, unsurprisingly, gets us booted out. We exit to the parking lot and re-acquire our morally righteous friend who had been talking to his girlfriend for the last couple hours. He points out that one of the drunk girls that had latched onto us earlier in the night has snuck into the stretch Escalade and was trying to do donuts in the parking lot. The chauffeur was just realizing that he'd left his vehicle unattended with the keys in it, and was fairly fucking pissed. In the meantime, the groom has realized that he lost his wallet, presumably in the stage diving incident. So the group splits: team A tries to talk themselves back into the club to search for the wallet. Team B tries to get the drunk girl out of the Escalade.
The specifics are a bit hazy, but both teams succeeded. The wallet was recovered. The drunk girl was removed from the driver's seat. The chauffeur apparently did not harbor ill will against them, and allowed them to accompany us on the drive back to our starting point. While we had all assumed the girls were escorts hired by the groom's boss, it turns out they were just random girls who correctly perceived that they could probably get some free drinks and a good time out of us. One member of our group saw this as an opening and began making more assertive advances on the better looking of the two girls. This advance was thwarted when we arrived at the girl's car, which also appeared to be her primary living accommodation. A bunch of us were crashing at the groom's house, so we got to watch him get smacked around for a second time that night when he tried to crawl into bed with his bride to be while still covered in drawings of penises and hearts. Apparently the marker rubbed off on their new pillow cases. He joined us on the couches.