How do I hate thee ESPN?, let us count the ways

Passed a TV tonight showing Pardon the Interruption and blasted across the screen is a permanent advertisement for something called Captain Morgan Cannon Blast. Sounds like something enjoyed exclusively among dudes and pairs nice with ookie cookie.

google: apparently this is it. Yet another bro shot in the mold of Fireball, Goldschlager, and other flavored shit like honey-Jack Daniels. Fuck that. (Jager will always be legit though)

http://www.breakthrubev.com/~/media/...273F6D101B589D


Nice job ESPN, you've managed to sink a little bit lower. Seriously, what intern over at the Ocho came up with that copy?

Just wait, it's almost time for around the clock NFL draft coverage. Lord knows we all need more Mel Kiper.

A few things. First, there's this: http://deadspin.com/espns-curt-schil...-on-1771868863
Dear Lord, what an asshole. It's like, the only time you hear about the guy, he's either sick or fucking up again.

And, I looked up at one of the flat screens in the gym, I think, yesterday, and ESPN was broadcasting a Spring practice game from some big name college. April practice. The white shirts vs the starters, I guess. Not the highlights of the game, like there would be any highlights of such a game, but, the actual fucking game. The apocalypse is almost upon us.

Schilling's a clown.

the "game", it's just cheap content, they need to fill airtime.

haha, they just ran this commercial, this may be the most ridiculous commercial ever made. Male models hammer spikes into mountains! And drink whiskey!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rUyld6KTi4

So that's what my ever increasing cable bill buys me?

Things are coming to a head in sports programming. I get back to NY, and Comcast has dropped Yes, the Yankee channel. I can't watch Yankee games. Well, me, and millions. It's absurd. There oughta be a law. This is what happens when 250 pound infielders make a kings ransom. It's all too much fucking money.

the espn app is good for killing time, you can watch what's on any time. Yeah it might be a spring training game but if you're in a doctor's waiting room it's better than a 2-year-old magazine.

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Originally Posted by iceman

haha, they just ran this commercial, this may be the most ridiculous commercial ever made. Male models hammer spikes into mountains! And drink whiskey!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rUyld6KTi4

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That's the best cheap whiskey out there. 29 bucks in Colorado. Looks like they're going big time. That is a stupid ad, though.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Benny Profane

A few things. First, there's this: http://deadspin.com/espns-curt-schil...-on-1771868863
Dear Lord, what an asshole. It's like, the only time you hear about the guy, he's either sick or fucking up again.

And, I looked up at one of the flat screens in the gym, I think, yesterday, and ESPN was broadcasting a Spring practice game from some big name college. April practice. The white shirts vs the starters, I guess. Not the highlights of the game, like there would be any highlights of such a game, but, the actual fucking game. The apocalypse is almost upon us.

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That dumb spring practice game drew a better rating than any NHL playoff game. Ratings.....that's what they care about.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Benny Profane

So that's what my ever increasing cable bill buys me?

Things are coming to a head in sports programming. I get back to NY, and Comcast has dropped Yes, the Yankee channel. I can't watch Yankee games. Well, me, and millions. It's absurd. There oughta be a law. This is what happens when 250 pound infielders make a kings ransom. It's all too much fucking money.

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Things Benny doesn't do:

1. Ski
2. Watch the Yankees
3. Visit

You should totally see if you can get that dude fired.

They routinely get 100,000+ morons to show up for a spring practice game in Columbus, OH.

TMZspn is just monitizing their stupidity.

If 100,000 show up for a spring practice game- which I think is insane but whatever- no shit they televise it. Everyone in the south watches it.

Weird espn is only worried about ratings. As if they're a television/content company. Psshh

ESPN goes full retard.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/...ees-30-for-30/

How in the fuck do they cut out the bloody sock game? It's probably the most iconic game between the Red Sox and Yankees ever, not to mention the sock is displayed in the Hall of Fame. Just when you think they can't get any dumber...

They should have a draft recap show where they go over the 3 or 4 picks Kiper and Mcshay got right.
2017 NFL Mock Draft Version 1.0 coming soon!

Kipper almost nailed the mr irrelevant slot. Missed it by one spot. Thought that was funny.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by TahoeJ

ESPN goes full retard.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/...ees-30-for-30/

How in the fuck do they cut out the bloody sock game? It's probably the most iconic game between the Red Sox and Yankees ever, not to mention the sock is displayed in the Hall of Fame. Just when you think they can't get any dumber...

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Schilling is an asshole. He probably said something at the final meeting that resulted in this. And now he's doing his little bitch thing, like STFU, just to seal the deal. Fuck him.

Yes, Schilling is a huge asshole. But so what? You can't rewrite history just because someone was a dick. A solid one third of pro athletes are assholes.

ESPN sucks in every way possible. Cutting Schilling out is a total joke.

And apparently now they have a thing for DUI offenders. Melrose (or some other hockey analyst), Jalen Rose, and now Abby Wambach. Way to set the standard low.

http://money.cnn.com/2016/05/04/medi...yst/index.html

Quote:

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Originally Posted by TahoeJ

Yes, Schilling is a huge asshole. But so what? You can't rewrite history just because someone was a dick. A solid one third of pro athletes are assholes.

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I would think that about 100% of media executives are major assholes, so, don't sit across the table and tell them to go fuck themselves in creative ways as you're being fired if you want them to glorify you in stupid documentaries about the glory days.

Maybe said executive was a Yankee fan. It is Conneticut, after all.

espn claimed they cut pieces of that particular showing because the previous show (a live softball game) went long.

Yeah, Digitaldeath was posting the other day about how good the softball coverage has been.

Holy fuck, TMZspn has gone full retard clickbait. Saw this on a colleague's desktop today.

Which NBA Team Are You? TAKE THE QUIZ!

It was the LEAD story.

Is Dunfee moonlighting over there?

"Stabbin" Ray Lewis and Cris Carter out.

I couldn't believe they ever employed Stabbin Ray in the first place.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by milton

I couldn't believe they ever employed Stabbin Ray in the first place.

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Why? They built of statue of him in Baltimore.

Triscuit Tirico out too. Going to NBC.

Murderin Ray Lewis commenting on the moral implications of Ray Rice was tv comedy gold. Only TMZspn could pull that off with a straight face.