I need to attend EpicSki Academy (caution- rant)
:rolleyes:
So I had my senior patrol test on Saturday at Sunlight. I was tested over 4 toboggan runs (two in the horns, two on tailrope)on their steepest mogul run (which was, I suppose, decently steep, although not near as long as Pali or something) and then skiing two longish mogul runs top to bottom and demonstrating short, medium and long radius turns on a groomer. :rolleyes:
Well, it dumped snow all day, and after digging two platforms and hauling a bunch of heavy-ass guys down the mountain, it was time for the skiing portion. I was exhausted by this time, but the powder had started to accumulate a bit, so I was kind of excited to ski. I skied the mogul runs down the fall line, they were soft and nice although my body was about dead I felt like I skied alright.
So evaluation time comes at the end, and it takes FOREVER for all the judges to debate over the candidates so in the meantime we all got plowed. I found out drunken darts is fun but very dangerous...so is drunken pool... I accidentally nutted an old guy wtih my pool stick as he walked by- shit was I embarrassed!! :eek: :o
When time came for me to go up for my evaluation, I was pretty much drunk enough that I couldn't sit on the high "hot seat" they make you sit on... I was clutching the sides for dear life. Then I listened to them tell me that I had mad skill with the toboggan, that I was excellent both in the horns and with tailrope...blah.
Then they told me that, well, basically I don't know how to ski. They said "you passed toboggan with flying colors, but unfortunately you failed skiing." Which at this point my drunk self busts out laughing. Then it sunk in and I say "uh, why?" Apparently, when I skied the bumps, sometimes the tails of my skis came off the ground when I turned. Now, I readily admit that I am NOT the most graceful bump skier, but I can ski them in the fall line, quickly and confidently without losing my balance. They said "if my skis leave the ground, I have the POTENTIAL of being off balance" I ask "do you feel that I was off balance?" ... "no, but you have the potential to be." The judges voted 7 to 3 to pass me, but it got overturned when the 3 said that overall I was a good skier but I am "fundamentally flawed." I failed because of my "potential." aaaaaarrrgh!!!!! :mad: :rolleyes:
So... sign me up for GapicSki academy so I can learn to keep my skis on the ground. And yes, I am probably SUPPOSED to keep my skis on the ground when I ski, but they can go fuck themselves. I guess that's the way I ski, and it does me damn fine when I'm skiing groomers, the Alta Chutes at Jackson or anyplace else. Plus, keeping your skis on the ground is boring! :p
End of rant...sorry.
Oh yeah, Farmer, the reason I didn't call you was because I got drunk at 5 pm and lost my cell phone. I think it's in the patroller's car I was riding with. :D oops. I'll call you when it comes back to me. We had to stop about 7 or 8 times on the way back for me and the other candidate to piss in the ditch. It was amusing to say the least.
BTW, those tests are hard... only 4 people out of 15 passed, and I was the only one who "half-passed."
After I get "skiing lessons" I will be allowed to attempt another test. On a good note though, At least I got the toboggan portion out of the way. That's (supposed to be) the hardest part. :p :D
wow, I hope no one read all of this! haha.
Re: I need to attend EpicSki Academy (caution- rant)
Quote:
Originally posted by snowfire
wow, I hope no one read all of this! haha.
I did...
...and was quite amused! :cool:
Re: I need to attend EpicSki Academy (caution- rant)
Quote:
Originally posted by snowfire
... I accidentally nutted an old guy wtih my pool stick as he walked by- shit was I embarrassed!! :eek: :o ...
If I had a dollar for everytime I nutted someone... ;)
Too funny! (except for the "can't ski" part)
Re: I need to attend EpicSki Academy (caution- rant)
Quote:
Originally posted by snowfire
:rolleyes:
So I had my senior patrol test on Saturday at Sunlight. I was tested over 4 toboggan runs (two in the horns, two on tailrope)on their steepest mogul run (which was, I suppose, decently steep, although not near as long as Pali or something) and then skiing two longish mogul runs top to bottom and demonstrating short, medium and long radius turns on a groomer. :rolleyes:
Well, it dumped snow all day, and after digging two platforms and hauling a bunch of heavy-ass guys down the mountain, it was time for the skiing portion. I was exhausted by this time, but the powder had started to accumulate a bit, so I was kind of excited to ski. I skied the mogul runs down the fall line, they were soft and nice although my body was about dead I felt like I skied alright.
So evaluation time comes at the end, and it takes FOREVER for all the judges to debate over the candidates so in the meantime we all got plowed. I found out drunken darts is fun but very dangerous...so is drunken pool... I accidentally nutted an old guy wtih my pool stick as he walked by- shit was I embarrassed!! :eek: :o
When time came for me to go up for my evaluation, I was pretty much drunk enough that I couldn't sit on the high "hot seat" they make you sit on... I was clutching the sides for dear life. Then I listened to them tell me that I had mad skill with the toboggan, that I was excellent both in the horns and with tailrope...blah.
Then they told me that, well, basically I don't know how to ski. They said "you passed toboggan with flying colors, but unfortunately you failed skiing." Which at this point my drunk self busts out laughing. Then it sunk in and I say "uh, why?" Apparently, when I skied the bumps, sometimes the tails of my skis came off the ground when I turned. Now, I readily admit that I am NOT the most graceful bump skier, but I can ski them in the fall line, quickly and confidently without losing my balance. They said "if my skis leave the ground, I have the POTENTIAL of being off balance" I ask "do you feel that I was off balance?" ... "no, but you have the potential to be." The judges voted 7 to 3 to pass me, but it got overturned when the 3 said that overall I was a good skier but I am "fundamentally flawed." I failed because of my "potential." aaaaaarrrgh!!!!! :mad: :rolleyes:
So... sign me up for GapicSki academy so I can learn to keep my skis on the ground. And yes, I am probably SUPPOSED to keep my skis on the ground when I ski, but they can go fuck themselves. I guess that's the way I ski, and it does me damn fine when I'm skiing groomers, the Alta Chutes at Jackson or anyplace else. Plus, keeping your skis on the ground is boring! :p
End of rant...sorry.
Oh yeah, Farmer, the reason I didn't call you was because I got drunk at 5 pm and lost my cell phone. I think it's in the patroller's car I was riding with. :D oops. I'll call you when it comes back to me. We had to stop about 7 or 8 times on the way back for me and the other candidate to piss in the ditch. It was amusing to say the least.
BTW, those tests are hard... only 4 people out of 15 passed, and I was the only one who "half-passed."
After I get "skiing lessons" I will be allowed to attempt another test. On a good note though, At least I got the toboggan portion out of the way. That's (supposed to be) the hardest part. :p :D
wow, I hope no one read all of this! haha.
RPPS (Rant post...)
:cool: "they can go fuck themselves." :cool:
Re: I need to attend EpicSki Academy (caution- rant)
Quote:
Originally posted by snowfire
Apparently, when I skied the bumps, sometimes the tails of my skis came off the ground when I turned.... They said "if my skis leave the ground, I have the POTENTIAL of being off balance" I ask "do you feel that I was off balance?" ... "no, but you have the potential to be." The judges voted 7 to 3 to pass me, but it got overturned when the 3 said that overall I was a good skier but I am "fundamentally flawed."
First off, I am not a skier- I try, but I have a long way to go. I was a competitive runner for almost a decade, however, as well as a cyclist and rode frequently with professional cyclists and triathletes.
What I can say is that there is no correct way to run or to ride, everyone has a form that works for them and this rarely precludes one from reaching the pinacle of their sport. I don't think that skiing is any different in this respect.
We're talking about your ability to negotiate a specific challenge on the hill, not to score "pretty points". How presumptuous of those three! I would have spat on them. Go find another mountain to patrol on, these aren't the kind of people worth associating with.
There's no way I'd ever attend an Epic Academy event. With a couple of exceptions (e.g., Ott G.), those instructors are insufferable, which is one of the reasons I left that board and only venture back occasionally now.
Re: Re: I need to attend EpicSki Academy (caution- rant)
Quote:
Originally posted by Viva
We're talking about your ability to negotiate a specific challenge on the hill, not to score "pretty points". How presumptuous of those three! I would have spat on them. Go find another mountain to patrol on, these aren't the kind of people worth associating with.
Oh, it was a senior NSP test, not an A-Basin specific test. That was why it was at sunlight. :) The A-Basin gang is great- the AB judges told me they were confident I could easily ski anything at AB. Unfortunately that holds no weight, it's all on how you perform that day, and the judges were from other ski areas as well- AB, SUnlight, ski cooper, and somewhere else.
edit- I was being sarcastic about the epicski thing too, I think I'd probably be denounced from the maggot community if I did that ;) :D . I'll just go to the next test, try my damndest to ski just the way they want me to, pass the fucking test and go back to skiing the way I like it. :cool:
Re: Re: I need to attend EpicSki Academy (caution- rant)
Viva, it's actually funny that you mention pretty points, especially here where the American system for skiing went to a great deal of effort to move away from "final form" teaching and judging to a skills-based concept.That was a big step to move away from pure form and towards evaluating one's skiing using the right metrics (not to mention that proper form for hardpack and powder hardly look the same at all!). But when those guys were looking at the tails of the skis being off in the bumps, they were likely evaluating a skill (balance from what they said, but pressure could be it too).
Half-fast and altagirl have it right: ask for a demo, and ask people who've passed (or better, given the exam) what the examiners will look for and why. The what is so you can adapt to pass the test, and the why is because you may just learn something and improve your skiing. I know I have by doing that, even though I wouldn't say I ski the "right" style all the time. But I've picked up more efficient ways of doing things along the way.
drC
Re: I need to attend EpicSki Academy (caution- rant)
Quote:
Originally posted by snowfire
Apparently, when I skied the bumps, sometimes the tails of my skis came off the ground when I turned. . They said "if my skis leave the ground, I have the POTENTIAL of being off balance"
[/B]
That is total bullshit. These guys dont know a ski from thier asshole. If only your tails leave the ground, it is actually an indication that you are in balance. If your tips are coming off the snow you have problems, but if it is just your tails you are in no way out of balance. And while it may not be optimal to pick your tails up in the bumps, it isnt going to hurt you unless you are in a comp or something. In fact, we have done a drill clinicing for psia stuff where they have you stand still and jump straight up. If your inbalabnce your tails will come off the ground first. You passed the test, those guys need to suck your balls.
