Query for the mass(es)

....Maybe it is because I still live in the flatlands at the ripe age of 24, and I yearn to be gone from this godforsaken place. I ski the park hard, when I can. I educate myself on the newest gear, bindings...sticks...beacons...goggles.. It serves as my foremost therapy. It's Saturday night and I'm priming my liver for a night with the local crew of degenerates, but thoughts of endless turns and floating low-consequence booters are inundating my mind. My 'close' friends castigate me for my obsession, and I don't understand their distaste, more importantly, I don't care. At the onset of my buzz that is all I can muster in mind, like a long-distance lady friend....making turns with friends that share my ski cancer. So here I sit, alone watching TGR porn, with a shit eating grin on my face. This is my rant and I feel compelled to put these thoughts into the archives of TGR because well, it's the most appropriate place-the only place. I hope all is well with my fellow minions tonight.

So what's the query?

I guess in my ghord there was a question...apparently I coulnd't find it....... Lo Siento.

http://www.cyberbee.com/wwho/images/titleho.gif

Severe Weather Alert from the National Weather Service

...KEWEENAW-NORTHERN HOUGHTON- INCLUDING THE CITIES OF... COPPER HARBOR... HOUGHTON 527 PM EST SAT JAN 17 2004
... WINTER STORM WARNING IN EFFECT UNTIL 6 PM EST SUNDAY...

LAKE EFFECT SNOW SHOWERS WILL CONTINUE TO DEVELOP EARLY THIS EVENING... AND INTENSIFY THROUGH THE EVENING. EXPECT 3 TO 7 INCHES OF SNOW TONIGHT WITH AN ADDITIONAL 3 TO 5 INCHES OF SNOW ON SUNDAY. NORTHWEST WINDS OF 20 TO 35 MPH WILL PRODUCE CONSIDERABLE BLOWING AND DRIFTING SNOW... REDUCING VISIBILITY BELOW ONE QUARTER MILE AT TIMES. ADDITIONAL LAKE EFFECT SNOW AND BLOWING SNOW WILL CONTINUE INTO SUNDAY NIGHT AND MONDAY.

REMEMBER... A WINTER STORM WARNING MEANS SEVERE WINTER WEATHER CONDITIONS ARE IMMINENT OR HIGHLY LIKELY....



Or head north and bring the fattys, it is a fucking blizzard outside now. Tomorrow should be sweet, monday too, and tuesday...:D

I here by command you to do the following:

1. Break up with girlfriend. If you don't have a girlfriend then throw away that last issue of Penthouse you've been um um reading. Ya that's it. Reading.

2. Pack up beat up Ford Vehicle. Sorry but it seems most of us from the flat mid-west seemed to have a beat up Ford to drive out west. I did.

3. Quit job, And stock up passenger side of car with boxes OF Mac & Cheese dinners, Raman noodles, Peanut butter, and several cans of spam.

4. Put UP map of Rocky Mtn Ski resorts on the wall of your bedroom.

5. Throw dart at map on wall.

6. Sell old albums and whatever you else can sell to raise money. Even your blood. Clear out your bank account.

7. Drive to the nearest ski resort the dart landed next too. Just drive and Don't look back. The best thing that ever happened to you is just 24-34 hours of driving away from you. :cool:

To coin a phrase: "sometimes you just have to say, WHAT THE FUCK". ;)

says the guy who wound up in eastern canada:rolleyes: :D :D
just giving you a hard time TJ, but your advice is right on! Leave now young grasshopper

Quote:

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Originally posted by laseranimal
says the guy who wound up in eastern canada:rolleyes: :D :D
just giving you a hard time TJ, but your advice is right on! Leave now young grasshopper

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LOL. Ya but I met the greatest babe in the world and it just happened at this eastern ski resort. The greatest thing in life is finding an athletic, cool, smart, beautiful, hot, woman that can ski, loves to ski, used to live in Alaska and dreams about going back. I found that women here. Hey what can I say. Life is good

:D

haha ya that does sound good!!

Quote:

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Originally posted by TJ.Brk
I here by command you to do the following:

5. Throw dart at map on wall.

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Be careful, you might hit Utah. As we all know, Utah sucks.

Quote:

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Originally posted by TJ.Brk
I here by command you to do the following:

1. ..... If you don't have a girlfriend then throw away that last issue of Penthouse you've been um um reading....

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As someone who lives out west in a smallish mountain town, I can tell you that this is bad advise. Every mountain town I've ever known has the common trait of being seriously female deficient. You'll need that mag. Trust me. ;) Sure, you could obtain them out there, but you'll certainly be cash strapped, and porn will be low on your priority list.

Other then that, GET OUT THERE. Best thing I ever did.

women swhwimmin!

Fokkin move, who cares if you can con some whiney bitchy too much makeup no doin shit midwestern ho (no offense to your woman if you got one btw) who'll just dump him the second Joe Ripper Dude comes rollin through the bar she's working at while he's working as a night bellman.

Just move.

Don't forget the "Fuck You" letter to all your creditors (except for one that you transfered every dollar onto another card leaving its whole balance open).

Also, X summit county off your map, this years gonna be a bust (reverse psycology).