Hop is currently setting the record for worst flatulance ever!

i can't even describe the carnage that is his ass right now. After eating tuna-mac-and-sleeze for lunch, he has been blowing hot butt mud for almost three hours now, with time intervals between farts no more than 4 min. The worst thing is, they are very very loud and last 2 to 5 sec, and sound like a wipe may be required. the kitchen has been quarantined, and the couch will be burned as soon as he gets off. As for his underwears, they better be going outside in a sealed container as soon as he finishes dropping the cosby kids off at the pool.

Rectum? Damn near killed him :tongue:

Laughing...so...hard...I'm...crying...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... (Arty takes breath) ...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAH......ARTY!. . . . bWaHaHAHaHA......DITTO!....... hahahahahahahHAHhHAHhHAHa

Oh my. There must be a product out there to fix the problem. Aha! A case of Beeno should do the trick :eek:
I fear it may be too late though. Fortunately I'm on the other side of town.

[cartman] GODDAMN HIPPIES! [/cartman]

hop is riding in my RocketBox to the mountain tomorrow....

Wauconda snowball-fight idea has foe

By Susan Kuczka
Tribune staff reporter
Published December 7, 2004

As some Wauconda residents try to organize the world's largest snowball fight, at least one village trustee doesn't give the idea a snowball's chance.

"Snowball fights can get mean," said John Amrich, who hopes to block the event when the Village Board meets Tuesday night to discuss what is being promoted as a world record-setting snowball fight.

The sponsor, the local Lions Club, needs a village permit to hold the event Jan. 29 in Cook Park during its Winterfest celebration. Officials hope the snowball fight will earn a place in the Guinness Book of World Records.

Amrich worries about a lawsuit.

"If 3,000 people have a gigantic snowball fight, it's very possible someone could get hurt, and people are quick to sue these days," he said.

Hoping to avoid injuries, organizers say they will divide the snowballers into two teams, which will be kept at least 70 feet apart by snow fences.

The Lions Club also would have referees watching each team to keep overly enthusiastic combatants in check.

"We'll have people in front to make sure no one goes crazy," said Sal Saccomanno, a village trustee and Lions Club president.

The Guinness record for the world's largest snowball fight was set last year when 2,473 people gathered in Graubunden, a town in the Swiss Alps. In that event, teams pelted each other for 10 minutes.

In Wauconda, organizers don't expect any trouble.

"This isn't to air a grudge against a neighbor," said Bill Lutz, a Lions Club member who is the risk assessment manager for the village and the Wauconda Park District.

To draw a crowd to the Lake County village of 12,000 residents, Lions Club officials have scheduled other festival activities, including a fruitcake fling.

At least six schools have signed up for the event. Students will construct catapults--they can't be higher than 12-feet high--to launch fruitcakes into Bangs Lake.

"It's one of the most environmentally sound things we can do," Lutz said. "Because when the ice melts, the fish can eat the fruitcake, unless it turns out they don't like fruitcake either."

If the fling doesn't sound appetizing, there also will be a chili cook-off, a grumpiest old men shanty decorating contest, a Main Street ice-sculpting contest and an Ice Crystal Ball and bonfire.

Businessman Albert Antoni has agreed to fly his helicopter over the park to videotape the snowball fight, which must last at least one minute to be considered by Guinness.

Lions Club members hope Winterfest will raise $7,000 to aid charities for the disabled.

About the only thing still up in the air is what happens if it doesn't snow.

An average of 11.3 inches of snow falls at O'Hare International Airport during January, according to the National Weather Service.

But just in case, Lions Club officials are considering renting a snowmaking machine.

Park District Commissioner Joe Munson even has volunteered to truck in snow from Wisconsin.

In the meantime, club members say there's only one thing to do.

"Pray for snow," Saccomanno said

Quote:

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Originally Posted by White Chocolate

i can't even describe the carnage that is his ass right now. After eating tuna-mac-and-sleeze for lunch, he has been blowing hot butt mud for almost three hours now, with time intervals between farts no more than 4 min. The worst thing is, they are very very loud and last 2 to 5 sec, and sound like a wipe may be required. the kitchen has been quarantined, and the couch will be burned as soon as he gets off. As for his underwears, they better be going outside in a sealed container as soon as he finishes dropping the cosby kids off at the pool.

Rectum? Damn near killed him :tongue:

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Could this be from some long overdue Casa Que Pasa trying to make it's way out from Sunday? :eek:

Edit, repeat- do not hike behind Hop to Hemispheres. A WMD might be released out the ass.