This Just In: We're All Going to Die

Floods, earthquakes, fires, hurricanes, volcanoes, and war...the apocolypse is upon us.

We're all going to die.

Assuming we have 72 hours left to live I think I'll pack a sleeping bag, my touring gear, food, scotch, a shit load of grass and painkillers and head off in the goat for the Sawtooths with my two pups. There I'll yoyo whatever snow I can find, feed my dogs all the bacon, steak, chicken and gravy they can handle. I will be very high. I will ski until I can't even move which should be around hour 70. I will then sit down, have a steak and a tall glass of scotch. I'll swallow about 20 percocet over the course of the final 2 hours (after I choke the bishop one last time), then sit back and watch it all go down.

What are your plans for the end of existence? Gandalf told me we have 72 hours...

Not exactly sure but I know it includes a sack of marbles, 3 latex gloves and 2 quarts of 40 weight.

I am going to eat a big ass bag of shrooms and watch it all go down in Technicolor, while surrounding myself with a bunch of strippers in neon g strings.

I think I'll finally take a chance and drive the Hershey highway.

Oh...heading to slot country this weekend...maybe summit Borah the following then heading off to Moab for some biking and slot canyoneering the following weekend all while checking out the 24 hrs of Moab...just to come home, pack up some gear and head over the flodded east coast to see some family and ride some bikes...to come back to Utah, catch up on some work and head to Seattle for Halloween and a conference...just in time to come back to Utah and hit up the BC with Twoplanker, Trackhead, and a host of friends.

Hopefully the end of the world is over a month away.

I think I'll sit around and post about it on the board until it comes down. Maybe I can have an argument about the existence of God with Mr.G or somebody.

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Originally Posted by Stoysluttie1

Hopefully the end of the world is over a month away.

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I'll see what I can do.

FKNA!

I hope next comes blizzards... ;)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by The Reverend Floater

(after I choke the bishop one last time), then sit back and watch it all go down.

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This is so very, very wrong...

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Stoysluttie1

Oh...heading to slot country this weekend...maybe summit Borah the following then heading off to Moab for some biking and slot canyoneering the following weekend all while checking out the 24 hrs of Moab...just to come home, pack up some gear and head over the flodded east coast to see some family and ride some bikes...to come back to Utah, catch up on some work and head to Seattle for Halloween and a conference...just in time to come back to Utah and hit up the BC with Twoplanker, Trackhead, and a host of friends.

Hopefully the end of the world is over a month away.

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Yeah, baby, the world's not ending until I get some turn in.

i was going to make a post similar to this a couple days ago but i pussied out

it was going to be---

how cool is it that if we went to the doctor and he told us we had a month to live we'd all know exactly what we want to do, none of that disneyworld or see all these famous places around the world bs---no we'd all scrum up whatever money we had and if it wasn't enough we'd all sell everything we own and go skiing, not just skiing but awesome skiing like you'd finally sack up and spend the money to go to AK europe and go heli skiing. It would be the ski bum life wihtout the actual bum part. We'd live the ski life, your world would revolve around pow and be totally comitted to it with no sacrifces (besides eventual death). It would be a vacation from the crap of life into skiing perfection. I take a wierd comfort in the fact that if i knew i was going to die that i know exactly what id want to do.


p.s.--i don't think id be able to wait the ful month to just roll over and die, i'd really love to go out in a blaze of glory like skiing out an avy only to find out that i launch myself off a cliff into oblivion


pps- can you tell that im an east-coaster who has yet to ski out west, and in a wierd way wished the above woudl happen so that my ski dream coudl happen

I think I will do what I normally do and not have a concrete plan--just roll w/ the punches/do whatever my mood dictates. This could mean wild partying and big fun, maniacal house-cleaning, prank phone calls, or some quiet sulking in a corner. We'll just have to see. I am sure it will involve my favorite wine in mass quantities though.

I will tell ya one thing for certain...if and when I do finally get to meet The Big Guy/Girl/Whatever in the afterlife, he/she/it will have a lot of 'splaining to do!

Sprite

Porsche
Percoset
Pu**y
Powder
Pals

and defiantly

point'em


Not in any paticular order... perhaps :cool:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by iceman

I think I'll sit around and post about it on the board until it comes down. Maybe I can have an argument about the existence of God with Mr.G or somebody.

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OK, I don't believe in God. What are you going to do with the other 71 hours, 59 minutes, and 30 seconds?

Well with all the natural disasters, and the war one might think the end is near. But there is one missing piece of the puzzle that will signal our doom. If the "RedSox" go and win the world series, then for sure we are all doomed. ;)


But in reality. I would just kiss my wife, and enjoy the next journey with her. :)

I'll have to burn that bridge when I get to it I guess.

In other (good) news I heard the other day that in years of severe inclement weather voters usually choose to oust the sitting president.

You hear that: the fucking DROUGHT and HURRICANES are all the shrub's fault! Mother fucker :)

I would go down to campus, figure out how to get myself and bike on the roof of our student center and then hurl myself off until either my bike or I break.

I can't find any pics, but there are possiblities for big drops to nice, grassy trannys.

This would probably only last about 10 min. so I'd save it until the end...

I guess the first move would be back to the reds.

I'd carjack that dentist mofo in town with the Ferrari Modena, and, um, drive, um, around a lot.

I would definitely move to Texas and start giving root canals.

"You want to keep your tooth? Well guess what you republican motherfucker, you're strapped to my goddamn chair and its coming the fuck out.. " *sounds of drill* "yeah how ya like DEM apples bitch?"

In other news, I think I'd go wherever the snow was. End of story.