Grass is Greener Advice

[Danno]

After reading the details, my question for DTM is whether all those new responsibilities as head honcho is exciting and an opportunity for growth professionally or whether it is just stuff you won't like doing and won't add to your growth as a professional? If the former, everything you've said tells me you should take it. If the latter, much harder question. But I'm someone who strongly values the idea of doing stuff you like (or is good for you) and avoiding BS stuff.

[Iowagriz]

You'll be busier than hell for the next year or two, but you'll learn a ton about yourself, the business, and your relationship with your partner. Get through that portion and get the department running well, and you'll be back to what you have now (except with more money). I did it twice in my career, and both times, it paid off both financially and career wise.

Take your time in building your team, don't settle on a less than perfect hire (one of my first mistakes). This is why it can take up to two years to hire and get running. Be prepared to be overloaded, but also embrace it

Invest the money and retire early. I got laid-off at 56, severance to 57 and retired to enjoy life. As Lee Lau said, retiring can get boring (which really has surprised me). I might take some part-time work in the future, but I am content now.

[Dantheman]

All of it depends on what you want in the end. Would you like to be stretched by the new work? Or do you want to keep doing what you are doing (nothing wrong with that)? Would you be able to leverage the offer to get more from your current company?

Iowagriz pretty much nailed it, I think.

After reading the details, my question for DTM is whether all those new responsibilities as head honcho is exciting and an opportunity for growth professionally or whether it is just stuff you won't like doing and won't add to your growth as a professional?

Mostly the former, but with the anxiety that accompanies a big step into the unknown.

You'll be busier than hell for the next year or two, but you'll learn a ton about yourself, the business, and your relationship with your partner. Get through that portion and get the department running well, and you'll be back to what you have now (except with more money).

Yeah, that's the dream.

Thanks for the advice everyone.

[m2711c]

if you take this and it doesn’t work out, what’s yer backup plan?

[Dantheman]

Find another job?

[m2711c]

What are the chances that “other job” will end up paying less, at least initially, than what you’re earning right now now?


nobody ever wants to think about the possibility that they’re going to fail a particular endeavor. And, failure in that endeavor can come in lots of varieties that actually have nothing to do with fault of the person we are discussing.


How certain are you of the pending opportunity providing the consistent elevated returns you are expecting vers the known returns of your current circumstance?


a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, or so I’ve been told…

[nickwm21]

What side of the AEC industry? I assume the design side as you note a 40hr WW and a fixed commute… in that case, I find it hard to believe that the step up in responsibility and work hours would be astronomical. It sounds like a ~10% increase in demand for a 50% raise. Worth two years to test the water IMHO. Don’t burn bridges in the transition. “Rehires” are common in the industry.

Another way to think about it…. What pay bump from your current employer would make you not even think about leaving? 20%



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[Dantheman]

What are the chances that “other job” will end up paying less, at least initially, than what you’re earning right now now?

How certain are you of the pending opportunity providing the consistent elevated returns you are expecting vers the known returns of your current circumstance?

Pretty low odds, and pretty certain.

What side of the AEC industry?

It rhymes with dental.

Don’t burn bridges in the transition. “Rehires” are common in the industry.

I'd go out of my way to exit amicably, and if the new position didn't work out I feel pretty confident that they'd rehire me like it never happened.

Another way to think about it…. What pay bump from your current employer would make you not even think about leaving? 20%

I've thought about that a lot. 20% would definitely make me think hard, but I'm pretty sure I'd be making more than my boss which could lead to resentment. This does not feel like a time for half measures.

[skaredshtles]

Retiring early was worth it. I checked out at 38 which was earlier than expected but that was after working 80hrs/week for the better part of a decade. No kids too so that helped with the calculus.

I probably would have retired around 40 if I didn't have to worry about kid expenses and health care. Goddam Canadians.

[LeeLau]

I probably would have retired around 40 if I didn't have to worry about kid expenses and health care. Goddam Canadians.

Fwiw some friends of mine in Germany also had the same calculations as us in Canada. Their Healthcare was about the same.

The cost of kids has gone up a lot also due to the expense of secondary education in the US which to me, was eye-opening.

[plugboots]

Money is nice to have. Take the job.

[skaredshtles]

Fwiw some friends of mine in Germany also had the same calculations as us in Canada. Their Healthcare was about the same.

Yeah - goddam Germans, too.

The cost of kids has gone up a lot also due to the expense of secondary education in the US which to me, was eye-opening.

You ain't kidding - 3rd one started at uni in August. 1st one finished Dec '22 and the 2nd finishes this May. I'm gonna be rolling in disposable income... in a few years.

[LeeLau]

Yeah - goddam Germans, too.


You ain't kidding - 3rd one started at uni in August. 1st one finished Dec '22 and the 2nd finishes this May. I'm gonna be rolling in disposable income... in a few years.

I've said to my brother that I'll help out the nieces when it comes time for their secondary education. Seems like a right thing to do. But it's an order of magnitude less in Can for tuition than in the US. UBC degree is $ 5k per year in tuition. US/International rates for UBC tuition is approx $ 25K per year and even then I'm told that's cheaper than the US degrees. Crazy

Another thought for DTM. You'll be forced/coached to practise bizdev and rain-making/schmoozing skills. That happened to me mid-career. I got comfortable with knowing how to adjust quickly when quizzed and running with ideas and translating them to action/implementation or figuring out reasonable alternatives. I'm sure you're already doing this but you'll be doing it more so than before when you're the top dog/lead. And that's a heck of a good skill to practise and learn.

One more thought re what altachic said. It always helps to have and earn more $. I call it saving/having a bag of FU money. It doesn't mean you have to tell other demands on your time FU. But it does mean that you can tell other "stuff" to take a hike. And imo that gives one a certain sense of freedom of choice. Whether that means, choosing to work more or to work less, or to take a sabbatical, or to hang with your kids, or to ski and lot/bike a lot and post excessively on TGR

[Dantheman]

Money is nice to have. Take the job.

Hard to argue against this.

[climberevan]

I always argue that people should work less, even if it means earning less. I've never really understood the drive to work a lot (40+h/wk) or even a shitload (80h? nuts!) for a lot of years in the hope that one can retire at 65 or so. That's selling one's best years so that one can "relax" when one is over the hill.

My personal situation is not widely transferable (self-employed for most of my career, frugal to the point of still being kind of a dirtbag, no kids, etc), but I have largely stopped working at 47. (And averaged around 20h/wk for the last 6 years or so.) I can afford to travel and buy new bike parts once in a while, but I'm not driving a car built in the last 15 years.

DTM's situation here, however, is a little different. It sounds like working way less is not really on the table, especially with a kid. It also sounds like the increased rate of pay could be so overwhelming that a few extra hours will be worth it. But do the math! If you're working 44h now and the new expectation is 55h, that 50% increase in salary works out to only 120% your current hourly rate. So if making 100k now, that's $43.70/hr vs $52.45/hr at the new rate/hrs. Just figure it out for your salary.

How much is riding your bike to work worth? Getting hit by that car seemed pretty fun, and surely you don't want to give up future opportunities for that. How much would losing another 10ish hours a week impact your time with your kid? How many fewer ridge traverses will you be able to do if you lose that time? Especially since you'll feel pressure to minimize the impact on the kid time.

I feel like people in general have really lost sight of the concept of "ENOUGH".

Like, how much money/clothes/cars/furniture/square feet/etc does one really need? Happiness, as we know, is mostly determined by one's in-built mindset unless one is genuinely suffering financially. If you're making enough money to live a comfortable life and you enjoy your work and co-workers and your job is stable, that "greener" grass is likely just our consumerist society talking.