The Nest, she is empty…

[Ted Striker]

I sent thing #3 a pic of my new office. He's like "hey, that's my room!". Not any more it isn't.

My next younger brother took my room the day after I moved out. Later I asked if he ever figured out the sneak out route (out the window, across the porch roof, down the tree - with the lynch pin being the window must be open enough before the parental units retired for the evening). He was like, "dude, I'd been waiting for that window for years!"

[Djongo Unchained]

Laissez les bon temps rouler
or
Let the good times roll.

I'ma guess he was shootin for that one...

Seano, don't you have a Retirement tour lap to finish? I bet the Mrs. would enjoy taking a lap witcha and now the girls are off partying on their own anyhow, amiright?

[riser4]

We have identical twins. Finally, after 6 years of college and grad school, with only half being away from home because of Covid, one is gone. Unfortunately, the way she left couldn't have been more painful, things were said that can't be unsaid and her mom isn't her biggest fan anymore because of it. We really don't like the guy she's with but that's for another time... Her sister is still here at home because that's the only way she could afford to go to the right grad school and she still has another 3 semesters. So, the quiet empty nest we were looking forward to won't happen for a while unless I get totally fed up and tell the one to split. Sometimes it's like my brain says 'Yo dude, you had a plan and it's a few years past time to see it happen' but then I think that my perception of what being a full-time dad was going to be 25 years ago was a little shortsighted. I dunno, it just seems like it's time to go get some shit done before I totally fall apart and actually get fat.

Vibes, man.

[seano732]

Laissez les bon temps rouler
or
Let the good times roll.

I'ma guess he was shootin for that one...

Seano, don't you have a Retirement tour lap to finish? I bet the Mrs. would enjoy taking a lap witcha and now the girls are off partying on their own anyhow, amiright?

Correct on both counts, Djongo…

[easyrdr]

I fucking loved the day my oldest went off to college, she became a nightmare her senior year of high school and it was time for her to go. She just started her sophomore year and I can say without a doubt her relationship with both me and my wife is 100% better. She came home this summer and all of us agreed we won't be doing that again. Still got two kids at home and the next in line is following sisters lead and becoming the same nightmare, she is a senior in high school so just got to make through the next 12 months with that one. From where I'm sitting, I love my kids, but I ain't missing them at the house. The freedom is awesome even with just the one gone, I can't imagine the level of awesome when all three are out.

[oftpiste]

I became pet free, a bachelor after a 30 year marriage AND an empty nester at almost the same moment. There was definitely a period of WTF? that quickly turned to FKNA! when I realized I could literally do anything I wanted any time I wanted: blast music at 2am, bring home strangers, have popcorn and bourbon for dinner at 9:00, walk out the door without doing anything but locking it. You get the idea. I fucking loved it. I suspect you will too.

Then came COVID and the Thing that was at college moved back in and still remains :/. As grateful as I am for the company during that time and as lovely a human as he is I'm ready to have the place to myself again.

I'll acknowledge I might feel a little more wistful if all three things were not close by and pretty attentive. But yeah, kid-free household and lifestyle does not suck.

[liv2ski]

I fucking loved the day my oldest went off to college, she became a nightmare her senior year of high school and it was time for her to go. She just started her sophomore year and I can say without a doubt her relationship with both me and my wife is 100% better. She came home this summer and all of us agreed we won't be doing that again. Still got two kids at home and the next in line is following sisters lead and becoming the same nightmare, she is a senior in high school so just got to make through the next 12 months with that one. From where I'm sitting, I love my kids, but I ain't missing them at the house. The freedom is awesome even with just the one gone, I can't imagine the level of awesome when all three are out.

Throw retirement in and life is fucking awesome, even if you are older, and your body starts fucking up occasionally. Love to see our youngest once a week for dinner. The oldest has her hands full with an infant, so I see her maybe once a month, which is fine by me.

[fatnslow]

[QUOTE=easyrdr;6916339]I fucking loved the day my oldest went off to college, she became a nightmare her senior year of high school and it was time for her to go. She just started her sophomore year and I can say without a doubt her relationship with both me and my wife is 100% better. She came home this summer and all of us agreed we won't be doing that again. Still got two kids at home and the next in line is following sisters lead and becoming the same nightmare, she is a senior in high school so just got to make through the next 12 months with that one. From where I'm sitting, I love my kids, but I ain't missing them at the house. The freedom is awesome even with just the one gone, I can't imagine the level of awesome when all three are out.[/QUOTE

Was it you or the wife that was hell on wheels as a high schooler ? My biggest fear when I became a parent was the fear of my kids ending up like me and my crew as teenagers but I somehow dodged that bullet 3 times.

[OldLarry]

Greetings brethren and mags of the TRGs…. Welp, it’s official, Mrs. Seano and I are empty nesters, having just left Thing Two at college in San Diego, while Thing One left the weekend before ( local but on campus housing)…. I’m obviously proud of my daughters, but I find myself kinda walking around in a fog, if that makes sense. Going from 100 mph at home to zero is really weird… And Mrs. Seano is taking it really hard, she alternates between total silence to bawling on the regular. My question to the collective that have gone through this, what helped you adapt and overcome? I’m sure it gets easier with time, but right now I’m (we) are pretty deep in the pain cave…. Any tips, advice, and suggestions are appreciated. And fuck me, if you need the cold breath of mortality kissing your neck, leaving your daughter in a college parking lot crying her eyes out is a great way to do so. Thanks in advance Mags. Oh, and suggestions not involving hookers and blow, I’m too old for that shit.

Get a refill on your ED Meds of choice and take the wife to a really nice hotel in Europe somewhere, stat-


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[skaredshtles]

Get a refill on your ED Meds of choice and take the wife to a really nice hotel in Europe somewhere, stat-


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Might I suggest the Swiss Alps, Dolomites, or perhaps Tuscany?

[skiJ]

When our second kid left we also found it bafflingly hard. We have become great friends with both our kids as they transitioned from little kids to adults. We bike and ski and backpack and surf and play sports and everything else together and we all have an awesome time. So when they were actually both out the door at college we had lost our little kids, our amazing older kids, and our playmates. Incredibly rough. But within a few days my wife and I started to feel the stuff we used to feel many years ago when it was just us - the friendship, the commonality of purpose, being in love. It was wild - it was like we were 25 and dating again. Pretty amazing. Still very sad at times, but getting to throw back to your twenties dating this person you love was a pretty good consolation prize. We have such a good time together.

And then you understand that this is the way it's supposed to be. My son is a senior in college, and when he was home this summer he was so incredible to have around - such an interesting, engaged, kind, funny, energetic, cool guy - but you could tell it was borrowed time. No matter how much we all enjoyed it, we all knew it wasn't meant to last. He's supposed to be out on his own now. It hurts but it's right.

I put this in the college thread which is too much work for you (ha) but just before she headed back to school a couple weeks ago we did a multiday backpacking trip, just my daughter and I. It's both something I'll cherish forever and at the same time was joltingly painful when we came back to reality and she left the next day. Still hurts when I really think about it two weeks later. But it's a beautiful hurt.

Now's your time to be back in love with your spouse. Be sad and miss your kids, but at the same time date your spouse again. Realize how much time you have to spend on things you love. Enjoy an easier time in your life. And watch them grow and explode into the awesome people you taught them they could be.

It gets much easier, but it never gets easy. And that's what makes it's beautiful, right? And in the meantime, your life is yours again, which gives you a million possibilities, just like you had 25 years ago.

^bump^ worthy post

+1 EWG


Thank you. skiJ

[GiantManta]

Wife drops oldest off in Maine tomorrow and she will be 2,100 miles away. We are excited but I’m waiting for the call from my wife tomorrow afternoon. Oldest is super stoked and feels like a great fit. I’m busy learning about east coast skis to help take my mind off things as it is weird without her in the house. Still is e one at home who is struggling with it as well.

[seano732]

100% this, but it takes a few years for some people to get here.

Alright for the last time, there’s no “weepy listlessness “ on my part…. My wife, maybe, but if any of you are moms with twin daughters who left at exactly the same time, please contribute your insights…I really appreciate the thoughts and perspectives from you all, currently high as a kite on the couch watching surf documentaries….

[Buzzworthy]

currently high as a kite on the couch watching……

Same. This is the way.

[Pow4Brains]

Ours have been out for a bit. It sure teaches you whether you are still friends with your spouse. Meeting new folks without kids becomes more challenging but there is a lot
more free time for marital relations.

This.


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[gravitylover]

Vibes, man.

I'm gonna carve out some time this winter to drag your ass out to ski. Be ready.

Alright for the last time, there’s no “weepy listlessness “ on my part…. My wife, maybe, but if any of you are moms with twin daughters who left at exactly the same time, please contribute your insights…I really appreciate the thoughts and perspectives from you all, currently high as a kite on the couch watching surf documentaries….

Im not mom but... Ours left for freshman year a few days apart because of tennis team stuff but, close enough. The first few days without them was weird and we just kinda got stuff done. Labor Day weekend was when the epiphany hit - We are still us, a little different but we are still in there! It was great It was like dating again (sort of) and open door sex was awesome but that novelty wore off pretty quickly. There's more to the saga but that'll get you started.

[seano732]

I'm gonna carve out some time this winter to drag your ass out to ski. Be ready.

Im not mom but... Ours left for freshman year a few days apart because of tennis team stuff but, close enough. The first few days without them was weird and we just kinda got stuff done. Labor Day weekend was when the epiphany hit - We are still us, a little different but we are still in there! It was great It was like dating again (sort of) and open door sex was awesome but that novelty wore off pretty quickly. There's more to the saga but that'll get you started.

Lol thanks man…. Some friends of ours that went through it recommended “walk around naked day” once a week. We picked humpday, so I’ll report back….

[Harry]

Humpday. I think you have a very enjoyable future ahead of you.

[yeahman]

Maybe you guys already covered this but one thing that really helped my wife get through the transition when our oldest left last year was getting on Snapchat so she could snap pics back and forth with our daughter most days. I think it really helped my wife to see her kid's face every day in her college environment. I don't think my daughter minded it either to be honest. They also message each other on Snapchat, which kids seem more inclined to do rather than actual text messaging these days. Apparently texting is considered too formal or something. Sometimes my wife shows me the pics if I happen to be standing there, but they disappear after you look at them. She doesn't Snapchat with anybody except our kids.

[liv2ski]

Lol thanks man…. Some friends of ours that went through it recommended “walk around naked day” once a week. We picked humpday, so I’ll report back….

Oddly, our room in Bergamo last year had the shower right by the bed. Nothing like being naked to warm up the old libido...